Should this bother me?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Mira_Ciara, Jul 7, 2016.

  1. Mira_Ciara

    Mira_Ciara Active Member

    Okay I'm making this thread to let out some feelings that have been kept secretive. So I have this friend. We have each other added on Facebook. We met 8 years ago on another social media site & have been good friends since. We were a lot closer then. Now we just like and comment on a few stuff. That's it. We don't really private message each other or talk in convo like we use to which I get that. Time has passed. We had just became teenagers & now were adults. We had a lot more free time then than we do now so that's not what's bothering me. I should go ahead and mention up-hand that we are of different races. He is African American & lives in New York. I am Caucasian & live in South Carolina. He's pretty much always been my gay best friend since he is gay & that doesn't bother me one bit. Now I'll tell you what does....

    So I've noticed this past year that he's gotten pretty bad about this. Never use to be like this until all of this started out-breaking on the News. He is strongly into the Black Lives Matter movement. Always sharing the hashtag, putting down law enforcement of my race & pretty much uplifting his own race while continuing to put down mine. This bothers me because we've been friends for so long & he knows that I'm reading these posts all on Facebook that he shares about my own race. I don't want to start the Black Lives Matter argument & that's not what this thread is about so please refrain.

    It's about a good friend of mine putting down my race knowing that I'm reading it. I don't know if I ever come to mind when he shares these things or not. I never like or comment cause I don't want his other NY friends to jump on me. I did notice that I'm the only white person that does like or comment on his normal posts. It's like I'm his only white friend. That alone doesn't bother me though because he is my only black friend. Personally I'm an All Lives Matter kinda girl. I think Black Lives Matter is promoting more racism & harm than good but I don't post that on my Facebook for him to see. HOWEVER he shares posts bashing All Lives Matter for me to see.

    So my question is... Should this bother me? Should I say something to him about his posts? Perhaps this is the end of our friendship? I've been so tempted to unfriend him but I don't like doing so without giving a reason to that person first. I'm just so tired of him putting down my race for me to see. It's disrespectful to me. It may not be to some reading this but this is just how I feel. I'm a pretty sensitive person & I know sensitive people don't belong on social media like Facebook which is why I keep my friends count at only 84.
     
  2. Northern

    Northern SF Supporter

    I'd suggest to hide his comments when he makes one. Facebook have good algorithms that analyze what we hide and expose us less to them. Also you might get the "see less feom X" option when you hide a post that annoy you.
     
  3. Mira_Ciara

    Mira_Ciara Active Member

    That's what I've been told to do. I'm just wondering if I should continue being friends with this person or not? Cause I really don't want to be friends with someone with such views. I'm pretty picky when it comes to who I consider a friend or not. I unfriended quite a few people when they came out as Donald Trump supporters that kept bashing my candidate, Bernie Sanders. I know I shouldn't be like this but I can't help it. Must be my Bipolar Disorder.
     
  4. Mira_Ciara

    Mira_Ciara Active Member

    I'm still gonna do what you suggested though. Thank you & my apologies to how I come off. I'm just a bit on edge today with other things. :/
     
  5. Mira_Ciara

    Mira_Ciara Active Member

    UPDATE: I went ahead & just blocked him but not without doing a very heartbroken & furious status that I probably shouldn't of ever done but I'm glad I did cause I got rid of the other BLM supporters on my page. One girl in particular from my town read it & insulted me in very long paragraphs about my outlook on this & how I felt. She even made a threat to physically harm me when she sees me along with a few others that sided with her so now thanks to all this I'm probably gonna get jumped & I'm feeling very suicidal.
     
  6. Flaxney

    Flaxney Well-Known Member

    It's not really fair for your friend to paint all people of European descent as racist oppressors. He's not really taking your feelings into consideration and he's alienating an ally. Unfortunately the Black Lives Matter movement has become politicised by antagonistic elements. I think that you should point out to him that his rhetoric insults you. Ignoring a problem only allows it to grow worse.
     
    Mira_Ciara likes this.
  7. Flaxney

    Flaxney Well-Known Member

    Gah, my response was too slow. Ignore my previous post.
     
  8. Mira_Ciara

    Mira_Ciara Active Member

    Thank you! I posted an update just now on what I did. I even took down my Facebook for awhile because I have other African descendants making threats at me over this.
     
  9. Mira_Ciara

    Mira_Ciara Active Member

    No worries!!!! :)