sick and tired

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by mpang123, Apr 23, 2013.

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  1. mpang123

    mpang123 Well-Known Member

    I've attempted so many suicide acts that I don't know what to do anymore. I've sought help and nothing works. I wish it was easy to die but apparently it isn't. I have awful mood swings and when I'm down I get really down. I don't know when enough is enough and I wish I could try to die one more time and be successful. I'm tired of rebounding back and forth. I'm so frustrated.
     
  2. blueyeguy

    blueyeguy New Member

    I'm new to this and I'm with you. I've tried, failed, sentenced to a psych ward for a while, outpatient crap too. What makes all this worse, is that even seeing a psychologist weekly does zero good. Great guy, but he can't solve my financial, relationship, chronic MS, or with house repairs. I've got no one to come home to, hardly ever leave the house, and pretty much spend 24x7 time here. What is the point, I ask every damn minute, every damn day. Ain't no drug in the world that is going to bring me a new relationship, provide money for me, or better my health. Fuck it, I say. Not if, but when for me.
     
  3. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    Do you have any kind of support in place for when you're on a downswing - recognise they are as you yourself said - mood swings - therefore you can come out the other side feeling better...
     
  4. mpang123

    mpang123 Well-Known Member

    I have group therapy everyday and I process my thoughts and feelings. However, when I come home I'm on my own if I get depressed. I keep obsessing about suicide almost half of my life and I'm tired of it. I have limited support when I am alone so that's why I'm seeking alternative ways for support.
     
  5. mpang123

    mpang123 Well-Known Member

    I'm tired of calling the crisis line. It's getting old and if i tell them i am not in eminent danger, they just brush me off. I just have ideations without a plan like i used to. However I am thinking of one more that will finish me off. I don't want to survive and become a vegetable or live with the consequences afterwards. Is there a part of the brain that triggers suicidal thoughts? I wonder about that because i know something must be wrong with my brain to constantly think about suicide. I don't believe I would be obsessed about it if my brain is functioning right. I don't know what to do anymore cuz I have been helped so much but I still am this way.I'm so frustrated.
     
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