I was on my way home from the doctors today and i just broke down. I've got yet another prescription for tablets that will knock me out for a week. I'm ill again but for some reason they're refusing to carry on with the 2nd of 2 operations i was MEANT to have...
im sick of spending so much time ill and off school. im sick of aving my meds changed or added to every month. i really dont want to deal with this anymore! i dont wanna deal with the illnesses and i sure as hell dont wanna deal with some fucking whore fronting me all the damn time just because she wants to feel big and superior knowing she'll get away with it. its not fair.
what happens last week? i lost it, i od-ed, not bad admittedly, i just felt the need to take a couple more tablets then usual but still i did it for a reason and didn't need any shit. on the way home she's fronting me, making fun of how i don't have the balls to go through with it!!! urging me to do it better next time! all night she was fighting with me, pushing me, urging me. since then she's pushing buttons telling me im wrong, telling me i'm worth nothing, making me feel so fucking small, telling me i have no reason to be in pain doing nothing. if that was the case i wouldn't be prescribed fucking morpine tablets, antibiotics, sleeping tablets. all sorts of fucking tablets every other month. if it was up to me i'd go to school. give me a wheel chair and i'm there but i can't walk. i can't walk, i can't stay awake because of the tablets. on the way home from the doctors i was just thinking...whats the fucking point of fighting illness after fucking illness and then just when i'm over fighting the illness i'm being fronted by a fuckin whore
im sick of spending so much time ill and off school. im sick of aving my meds changed or added to every month. i really dont want to deal with this anymore! i dont wanna deal with the illnesses and i sure as hell dont wanna deal with some fucking whore fronting me all the damn time just because she wants to feel big and superior knowing she'll get away with it. its not fair.
what happens last week? i lost it, i od-ed, not bad admittedly, i just felt the need to take a couple more tablets then usual but still i did it for a reason and didn't need any shit. on the way home she's fronting me, making fun of how i don't have the balls to go through with it!!! urging me to do it better next time! all night she was fighting with me, pushing me, urging me. since then she's pushing buttons telling me im wrong, telling me i'm worth nothing, making me feel so fucking small, telling me i have no reason to be in pain doing nothing. if that was the case i wouldn't be prescribed fucking morpine tablets, antibiotics, sleeping tablets. all sorts of fucking tablets every other month. if it was up to me i'd go to school. give me a wheel chair and i'm there but i can't walk. i can't walk, i can't stay awake because of the tablets. on the way home from the doctors i was just thinking...whats the fucking point of fighting illness after fucking illness and then just when i'm over fighting the illness i'm being fronted by a fuckin whore
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