Sigh... What does it matter...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by th3silent0ne, Mar 11, 2010.

  1. th3silent0ne

    th3silent0ne Well-Known Member

    Lately things have been really low. After a little bit of not self injuring, things went down hill. I'm still feeling depressed every night, and still dealing with parent issues (parents still fighting. Dad is never at home much anymore). I feel alone and worthless. I don't even know what a real family feels like. I have not felt love in a long time. I still hide in the shadows of my mind, and wear a mask to hide my sadness from others.

    Also there has been another issue. I came across a self harm video on youtube. As I read the comments I see comments from people saying they can relate and stuff. In the midst of those comments I find two people who are being cruel to almost every single commenter. I find myself then defending those being verbally abused. But in doing so I now find myself in a continuous conversation trying to get these guys to understand why we self harm. In return I am put down and also verbally abused. I've been told to just ignore them, but I can't seem to be able to.

    So yeh. I'm really emotionally damaged. I don't eat much anymore. I'm loosing myself. I don't know what to do. My blade is my only friend and my scars are an everlasting reminder that I am worthless. But whatever. It doesn't seem to matter much anymore. Sigh..
     
  2. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    some people will never understand no matter how often we try to tell them something ...
    they just don't get it and don't want to get it....
    I hope you can ignore those who are making fun of self harm...they are not good for you to be around....
    take care of yourself and forget about them if you can...
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    They don't want yur explanations they want to taunt and hurt you They are the sick ones getting enjoyment out of others pain. You are not worthless You are someone caring and understanding of others pain. You deserve to be happy so reach out and get help for you so you can heal and have a better life. I hear your pain and suffering please get hellp to stop it get counseling okay for you because you are worth it.
     
  4. Beautiful Disaster

    Beautiful Disaster Forum Buddy SF Supporter

    I can be your friend,
    its not that much if i am really honest but I guess I am better that the regular blade..