Lately things have been really low. After a little bit of not self injuring, things went down hill. I'm still feeling depressed every night, and still dealing with parent issues (parents still fighting. Dad is never at home much anymore). I feel alone and worthless. I don't even know what a real family feels like. I have not felt love in a long time. I still hide in the shadows of my mind, and wear a mask to hide my sadness from others. Also there has been another issue. I came across a self harm video on youtube. As I read the comments I see comments from people saying they can relate and stuff. In the midst of those comments I find two people who are being cruel to almost every single commenter. I find myself then defending those being verbally abused. But in doing so I now find myself in a continuous conversation trying to get these guys to understand why we self harm. In return I am put down and also verbally abused. I've been told to just ignore them, but I can't seem to be able to. So yeh. I'm really emotionally damaged. I don't eat much anymore. I'm loosing myself. I don't know what to do. My blade is my only friend and my scars are an everlasting reminder that I am worthless. But whatever. It doesn't seem to matter much anymore. Sigh..