So chalk the number of suicides in my family up by one. On Inauguration day, Howard went out on pills and alcohol, 50 years old. Though, to be fair, people are calling it an accidental suicide. Found out about it yesterday. Poor guy. Jeez, I'm thinking its time I try what my grandfather did while depressed - just drink yourself silly for as many years as possible. I feel like the world is collapsing around me. I'm going to just go into the bathroom and spend time stroking the scars up and down my body; best way of dealing with any hostile emotion. hmm... sorry that had nothing to do with Howard's death.