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Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Lost Disciple, May 24, 2007.

  1. Lost Disciple

    Lost Disciple Well-Known Member


    I can't even scream a rant anymore. I just feel drained, numb...

    I'm failing all of my classes at school and I'm a habitual truent. I'm stuck in on-campus detention every fucking day with idiots who seem proud of what they did to get there. I DON'T FUCKING CARE ABOUT YOUR CHEATING OR STEALING OR WHATEVER THE FUCK IT WAS!!! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!


    I used to use that space as private time. There's this abandoned stairwell that I could sneak into and hide in some storage space with a foot thick concrete filled door (I really wonder why it was built sometimes) and put in my headphones. You might say that blasting music doesn't count as quiet time, but it takes me out and above all the other problems. It soothes my nerves...

    I thought maybe I could use the headphones at detention and close my eyes to get the same basic thing, but they don't allow it. Since I'm stuck in on-campus until school ends they say they'll give me the same consequences as if I skip. And guess what that is? $175 fucking fine.

    So now I can't breeze out and compose myself at lunch. And I don't have the option of skipping class anymore, because if I do I get a $500 fine. What the fuck?

    They say that staying with the other idiots in the lunch room is a privelage, that if we abuse it they'll stick us in a room some where for lunch. Well, STICK ME IN THE FUCKING ROOM THEN!!! WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO TO DESERVE THESE ASSHOLES AT MY TABLE?!?! ALL I WANT IS TO ME ALONE!! But no, no, that's not possible, they can't just stick me in a room. Well why the fuck not?! I swear, I'm going to go postal one of these days--yesterday, in Honors English I fucking blew my top and got in a fight with another kid, which ended with his in-class assignment shredded and a hole in my pants and leg where he stabbed me in the pen. And guess who got blamed for it? Me!! It's not my fucking fault people won't leave me alone!!!

    They say that sticking me in a different room would promote social anxiety or some shit like that...

    And get this, the counselor at this school finally called me down to her office. I never realized how good the shrink I saw at Sparta a couple times was... despite my hate of her, at least she was smart. I had respect for her. I played the counselor down here so fucking easy she believed me.

    I hate this so much! Why the fuck can't I just be normal?! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!


    And then I wonder. How can I hate them so much but be so offended when no one replies to my SF threads?
    I probably just suck at writing anything compelling or interesting. But hey, it's my life as I see it, right?
  2. Tara

    Tara Guest


    im replying :D with lotsa hugs! :arms:
  3. kirstie113

    kirstie113 Member

    Bryan, I thought you were one of the good students. What had happened? When you get here, or if, I'm gonna freaking squeeze you. Like this ---> :hug: