hi. it's my birthday today, but to be honest, I feel awful. I feel old, alone, unemployed, insignificant, and afraid. I never thought I'd live this long - I never WANTED to live this long. I guess I go on because I'm too scared to check out by my own hands. It's awful to feel this way everyday..but I do. I have no choice but to put on a "good face" and try to move on...if I don't it will cause a situation in which EVERYONE will know how much of a failure I've become, and I don't want to live with that shame. *sigh* Maybe it'll be better tomorrow, I don't know...but tomorrows are becoming "just other days".