Simple Truths

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by Terry, May 22, 2012.

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  1. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    SIMPLE TRUTH 1

    Partners help each other undress before sex.

    However after sex, they always dress on their own.

    Moral of the story: In life, no one helps you once you're screwed.



    SIMPLE TRUTH 2

    When a lady is pregnant, all her friends touch the stomach saying
    "congrats".

    But, none of them come and touch the man's penis and say "Good job".

    Moral of the story: "Hard work is never appreciated.



    FIVE RULES TO REMEMBER IN LIFE

    1. Money can not buy happiness, but it's more comfortable to cry in a
    Corvette than on a bicycle.

    2. Forgive your enemy, but remember the arse-hole's name.

    3. If you help someone when they're in trouble, they will remember you
    when they're in trouble again.

    4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.

    5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then neither does milk.

    THERE YOU HAVE IT...and remember, life is good.
     
  2. pancake111

    pancake111 Well-Known Member

    This is hilarious and so true!!!! Did you think of these yourself or did you read them somewhere?
     
  3. lightbeam

    lightbeam Antiquities Friend

    looool Terry! Funny woman strikes again!
     
  4. Butterfly

    Butterfly Pokémon Master Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    Hahahahaha love these!
     
  5. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    these are good :)
     
  6. SaraRose

    SaraRose Well-Known Member

    Haha I love these!
     
  7. ZombiePringle

    ZombiePringle Forum Buddy and Antiquities Friend

    hmmm... very true....
     
  8. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    Funny and true. Thanks for sharing :mhmm:
     
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