You know if my current job did not require so much thought and effort. If I could just hang out in the background, and do my job. No stress of getting called at night no stress of my system going no nothing. If I could just program then I feel I could start a routine where i sleep my life away. I would come in and work 12+ hours everyday. Leaving only enough time to get home and sleep. Then maybe life would be bareable. I could just sleep my life away. I could accomplish nothing but making someone else rich. Then I could sleep. Life would be so much more bareable if I could just sleep it away. I guess that is why I am just lying in bed right now. I am trying to sleep away this crappy existence. Mainly since I do not have the means to end my own life quickly and painlessly. I just think that if I could sleep my life would pass me by. I would be nothing but a drone. Then one day I would die. It will be all happy.