I have always had periods of sleepwalking, ever since I was tiny.
When I was very little, I'd do things like go downstairs, wake up my grandparents, and refuse to go back to bed until my grandma had made me toast. Things like that. Perhaps a little irritating for people, but harmless.
Several years ago I started walking sometimes when I had nightmares, too. I'd run around, scream, cry, whatever. Sometimes it woke up my mum, other times I'd only know I'd walked beause I had wet feet, or woke up on the landing, or had bruises.
Now that wasn't fun, but it only happened very occasionally. Maybe a few times a year. Usually when I was very stressed or worried about something, or if I was just ill and had a high temperature.
Now, I suffer from PTSD. When I'm awake I often have awful "real" flashbacks, and panic attacks. I can get very worked up by the tiniest thing (for example, walking past someone in a shop who wears the same aftershave as the man who abused me) and suddenly feel very unsafe and basically terrified, and like I need to defend myself.
I now sleepwalk in one way or another several times a week, at least. I have horrible nightmares about my abuser, things like that, and I walk really badly. I shout and scream, last week I actually ran out of the house and sat in the back garden, I punch walls and things, fall over and end up screaming at the floor and trying to beat it up. But the worst part is that I attack my boyfriend. On several occasions I've punched, slapped, scratched, and kicked him really violently in my sleep, just because I happen to be having a bad dream (but not walking) and he puts his arm around me or something. I feel awful about it. He's been great about the whole thing but it makes me feel so bad. He used to try to stop me (as anyone would!) by holding onto my wrists but of course that just makes me much worse, so he doesn't do that now. He just takes it.
I was wondering if any of you know a way I can help stop myself sleepwalking so much, or so violently. I know that ultimately counselling is the answer, but I have to wait for that. Is there anything else I can do?
When I was very little, I'd do things like go downstairs, wake up my grandparents, and refuse to go back to bed until my grandma had made me toast. Things like that. Perhaps a little irritating for people, but harmless.
Several years ago I started walking sometimes when I had nightmares, too. I'd run around, scream, cry, whatever. Sometimes it woke up my mum, other times I'd only know I'd walked beause I had wet feet, or woke up on the landing, or had bruises.
Now that wasn't fun, but it only happened very occasionally. Maybe a few times a year. Usually when I was very stressed or worried about something, or if I was just ill and had a high temperature.
Now, I suffer from PTSD. When I'm awake I often have awful "real" flashbacks, and panic attacks. I can get very worked up by the tiniest thing (for example, walking past someone in a shop who wears the same aftershave as the man who abused me) and suddenly feel very unsafe and basically terrified, and like I need to defend myself.
I now sleepwalk in one way or another several times a week, at least. I have horrible nightmares about my abuser, things like that, and I walk really badly. I shout and scream, last week I actually ran out of the house and sat in the back garden, I punch walls and things, fall over and end up screaming at the floor and trying to beat it up. But the worst part is that I attack my boyfriend. On several occasions I've punched, slapped, scratched, and kicked him really violently in my sleep, just because I happen to be having a bad dream (but not walking) and he puts his arm around me or something. I feel awful about it. He's been great about the whole thing but it makes me feel so bad. He used to try to stop me (as anyone would!) by holding onto my wrists but of course that just makes me much worse, so he doesn't do that now. He just takes it.
I was wondering if any of you know a way I can help stop myself sleepwalking so much, or so violently. I know that ultimately counselling is the answer, but I have to wait for that. Is there anything else I can do?
