Slipping off the edge

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by despoina, Dec 9, 2011.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. despoina

    despoina New Member

    Ive been abused by my father since i could remember. he would get drunk and or high and just beat me until i go unconscious. my mother never tried stopping him... i suffer with ptsd, agoraphobia, depression, bipolar, and temporal lobe epilepsy. i been bullied through out my school years. i dont enjoy holidays or my birthday without flash backs and horrible depression. i got taken away by the state when i was 15 years old with my younger brother. hes back home since they would allow me 1 to return. i was suppose to return home and my brother to go up for adoption but my mom kept crying saying she rather my brother. so i told workers i didnt want to go home... which really i didnt. in the end he did. im horrified to leave my house.. even my room. im terrified ill be harmed. my mom would say to me if you leave someone will kidnap you and rape you, beat you and youll never see your family again. im on a bunch of meds and hate taking them since i still feel like crap. i just want to end it all, i hate waking up in the morning, i hate looking in the mirror, i hate that i do nothing but suffer. ive tried cutting in the past but it didnt work. my main self harm is sleeping as silly as that sounds. ive been thinking of committing suicide after the holidays that way it wouldnt ruin anyones spirit. im trying to talk myself out of it but its harm.. i want help i want to be happy, live happy. be a real person... but some people cant never be happy and i just think im one of them...

    i hope that all made sense, theres more to the story than written but writing it bring up flash backs
  2. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    life has been incredibly unfair to you. parents are supposed to love and care for you, not beat you. schools should be places where you learn and make friends, not get bullied.

    I know that there is no way I could take away all of the pain, but I wish that I could.

    I guess all I can do is to remind you that you deserved so much better than this.

    I hope that there is a way that we can help you get through this

  3. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    Welcome, you're in a safe place. There are a lot of caring people, and you can get plenty of support and encouragement.

    You are important, and I'm glad you're here.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.