I'm starting to smile again. After a few weeks of ntohing but venting and multiple suicide attempts, I think I'm coming to my senses. What is the point of killing myself? Sure its to get rid of all the suffering, but I truly want to feel what its like to be normal and happy. My anxiety is being worked on independently. I actually went up to a group of friends bigger than two and started contributing to the conversaion (Mikel you'd be proud!) I've been a bit more interactive in school, and participated in a skit in theater that turned out to make everyone laugh until they fell. I haven't opened up yet about my problems, and truthfully I don't plan to. I'm just going to take this epiphany as far as I can and hope it makes me better.