So agitated right now

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SF Supporter
So my computer keyboard is not working, and whenever I need to type something, I have to go to my cousin's house across the yard to do so. Well, her jerk of a son has stopped by and now I'm feeling uncomfortable. See, about two months ago, he gave me yet another one of his self righteous hypocritical lectures that I didn't need nor asked for. Since I didn't respond the way he wanted me to aka sit there and let him talk without saying anything, he hit me. As weak as this will sound, instead of hitting back, I called the police. As I was talking to the dispatcher, he grabbed the phone out of my hands and almost broke it. I got another phone in the house and he left.

He told the cop that he didn't hit me and I had been drinking. I told the cop I had two shots of vodka. If I had been the one in the wrong and was drunk and started it, then I would have been arrested, but that wasn't the case. What pissed me off was that the jerk lied because he did hit me. After all that boasting about how I have to respect him and how if he had my way, he would have kicked me out of my aunt's house, he lies...and that makes me sick. I wake up every day hating myself because I am not done with college or have a job. I am not some bum and freeloader and he acts like if I have a can of beer even I am commiting some horrible act of sin. I mean if he feels that drinking is wrong that's's not fine when he too drinks. That's like me condeming someone who cuts themselves because their cuts are more recent than mine if that makes sense.

And this wasn't something that's new, my anymosity towards him has been building for years now. He has always made jerkoff and dickish comments in the past and last year he arrogantly talked about my mother's parenting he's father of the year or something.

Anyway, I'm sorry for writing so much and whining like this.

total eclipse

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Staff Alumni
It is good you are posting hun good to get all that pain out okay Keep posting I am sorry he treated you so poorly but glad you did call cops on him maybe smarten him up a bit hugs


SF Supporter
My family doesn;t live in one house, but we do live close by. Several years ago I left the storage house unlocked by mistake. Nothing was stolen or anything but he confronted me on it. Initially I hadn't realized I did leave it unlocked (it apparently had been unlocked for two weeks and no one noticed) and the way he confronted me on it was like someone looking for a fight. Long story short, he put his hands on me twice and I did nothing. He apologized a little later, but part of me thinks he did so because he knew he could have gotten arrested for assault.

And the thing is, when I'm wrong I accept the consequences of my actions...I'm just tired of walking on egg shells when it comes ot this toxic family. They expect me to appease and change for them, yet they always have some bullshit excuse for their dumbass habits and ways of thinking.
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