So close... to living

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Calleo, Sep 15, 2012.

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  1. Calleo

    Calleo Well-Known Member

    I've made progress.
    I've stepped way out of my comfort zone, and I've made decisions that have caused me a lot of stress.
    I could keep going, I'm not too sick of it/scared yet.
    I think I could even become a respectable person in a matter of months.


    Just vagueposting here, no point in getting into details.
    But I really wish I didn't have to consider suicide at this point.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I too wish you could continue to make progress continue to reach out to your support team and let them know what is going on hun There is people to help you don't give up ok You have worked too hard to do that hugs
  3. Calleo

    Calleo Well-Known Member

    My what? Who are you talking about?
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I was talking about getting the support you need to not have such thoughts of suicide Talking about what you wrote wishing not have to consider suicide at this point
    I stated that you do not have to do consider that if you reach out and get help
  5. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    Your testimony of progress is excellent to hear. Stick with it and focus, even though it has taken you outside your comfort zone. It is the hidden strength that you find within your will (aka, will power) that will help guide you to continued success.
  6. Calleo

    Calleo Well-Known Member

    Yeah, no.
    Pretty sick of it now.

    In addition to everything else I'm heartbroken too. I really don't think I know how to deal with this.
  7. People suck. If you aren't respected by the people around you then you should find a new crowd. Everyone deserves respect.
  8. Calleo

    Calleo Well-Known Member

    You don't understand. Subjectively, yeah, I'm just a person, victim of my own circumstances like everyone else, and I deserve some basic respect. I don't put up with it for long if someone really tries to treat me like trash.
    But objectively, for people who I'm a stranger to, there isn't much to respect. I can't even take care of myself. It sucks to always be needy. It really makes me less respectable. Don't try to argue that, just think about what I'm saying.

    When I had a boyfriend, I realized how nice it feels to care about someone else, to want to take care of them, selflessly. But I needed more from him than I could offer him, and that sucked.

    I'm 21, btw. I'm also totally useless for any purpose, obviously. I wish someone needed me. I wish there was something I realistically could do for anyone.

    I gave up. Everything is too hopeless at this point.
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