So confused.

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by TheBLA, Jun 12, 2007.

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  1. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    I dunno what to do. I just come here and waste time mostly posting in the Coffee Loungue in the trivial threads. Nobody here knows me, cares about me, can't make connections, can't do anything at all.

    I don't know if I should keep living or kill myself, I need some guidance, some direction, I guess I need someone to tell me what to do, can't do anything myself.

    I'm just so confused and lost. I don't know why I shouldn't kill myself but then I'm afraid of death and the afterlife is there is one but then I'm stuck in this shitty life of mine. So what can I do, just try to make the most of it? Its so hard since I've wasted my whole life so far and been a loser and so its REALLY hard to change and become "normal". I haven't been raised right, raised normally so I'm going to be abnormal my whole life. Sounds dramatic I know.

    I need help but dunno what kind of help.

    Your all going to say I should not kill myself. I need some reasons to live or something. Help please!!!!!!!!!!

    EDIT: The only thing I'm sure of is that I don't like my situation, I want to be happy. I dunno if I can ever be happy though. And I need help to talk more, express myself, help myself.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 12, 2007
  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    You are right in that I will say you should not end your life. You don't speak much about your situation other than I know you are not really comfortable sharing with people. If you would like to change that, my PM box is open for you. You did reach out once and I felt honored that you did. I would be glad to discuss reasons with you, but without knowing your situation I could only generalize and I sense that is not what you want. Your life does have value. I enjoy your posts in coffee house. Many times they are something that puts a smile on my face, and that is not easy to do. I thank you for that. Please hang in there. We can work together and get through this. :hug:
  3. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    I feel like I'm so messed up that I can't be fixed or nothing can help. And I guess I feel so embarassed at how much I am lacking compared to others that I'm too ashamed to talk about it? But I really should, gah, this sucks.

    I dunno if I could write everything out.

    Gentlelady, what should I do? Start a thread and just let everything out, think for a while about what causes my depression and why I want to commit suicide? And just keep on making threads as time goes on?

    I've been here almost two years and haven't done anything at all, how pathetic of me. Damn damn damn damn.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 12, 2007
  4. jcat

    jcat Staff Alumni

    my suggestion is exactly what you were asking gentlelady. start a thread, and post there when you are doing ok and when you are ahving problems. that's what i do. i post everyday. try it, it might help. if you ever want to talk off forum, i'm here for you.
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