So imagine the scene: I've just finished another day of talking to fucking idiots at work, come home and jump on here, watch the same videos on youtube, post some emo BS on facebook and achieve nothing. in 10 minutes, I'll go to bed, cry myself to sleep, wake up about 11.30, drunk half a bottle of vodka to get back to sleep and wake up with a bastard of a hangover. Wash, rinse and repeat, this is my life day after day I can't get a girlfriend because Im so ugly, I dont have the money to go back to uni and study. I;ve got no friends, a deadend job, no family aside from my parents I really give a shit about and absolutely nothing going for me at all. Every time I try to change something, I fall flat on my fat arse and nothing seems to work. i've applied for dozens of other jobs, tried making friends and meeting someone and nothing seems to have worked at all. I cant go out on a night out because of how I look, I even get spat at in the street on the way to work. So Im wondering, is there any more to life than this? If all my life is going to be is a series of letdowns and disappointments, I dont want it anymore. I dont want much out of life, really just a good job, kids and a loving relationship, thats it. Im tired of being told to "hang in there" or "theres someone for everyone" and a million other little platitudes people say when they really dont know what else to say. Im physically tired of trying to hold together and go through the motions when all i want to do is just be able to feel something other than disappointment. Its almost as if the sheer monotony and sheer bullshit of life is drowning me. I've even resorted now to carrying an assload of tablets just in case things get bad. This is not the way my life should be. So my question is this: is there any point to me bothering any more? things havnt changed in 25 years, and I'll be fucked if Im living another year like this. What can I do to change things or am I better off just using one of my shotguns and having done with it?