I am just so done. I am body dysmorphic + avoidant. I have been in self-imposed isolation for 8 years. Most people couldn't handle it. I can, because i was neglected so bad as a kid. In this time i have seen no-one except shopkeepers and rent collectors, bar my aunt who adopted me, once. But there is just no hope. My problems will never get better. I cannot function. I am walking dead already. The only question is how to do it. Don't even know why im here. I guess somehow i hope one of you is magic, and can perform miracles. But i know you can't. I hurt that i can't see my family, that i cannot progress as a person, that i cannot function, cannot work, cannot even see my own mother. I am already dead. The rest is just a formality.