So frustrated!

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Beka, May 20, 2014.

  1. Beka

    Beka Well-Known Member

    I'm so frustrated with myself, I'm finally in a relationship and all I can think about is how he's invading my personal space. I hate it!

    I want to just be normal and not think about death, or think about all the what ifs. I want to get along with my life. I don't want to have to stop myself from crying at everyday things.

    I want to not feel frustrated for once I can't let my stupid emotions out!!

    I want to just be happy I'm in a relationship for crying out loud. I was the one who said we should be in a relationship and now I'm just frustrated and bothered by it.

    I don't want to feel like it's such a big deal when people ask me to do things.
     
  2. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN

    :hug: I am sorry that you are finding it so hard at the moment Beka. Unfortunately, it sounds from your post that you are one of the many many people who believe that if you have a relationship it will "fix" things - and the truth is that while it does fix some things, it does not fix everything. It is 'normal' to still have issues and problems even though you are in a relationship.

    The adjustment process can be difficult if you are used to being alone. Give yourself time, and by all means space if that is what you need. Communicate and keep things out in the open. I hope you can find a way forward.

    Stay safe :hug:
     
  3. Beka

    Beka Well-Known Member

    Please don't assume Freya, I do not believe that a relationship will fix everything in fact it's quite the opposite.
    I grew up around abusive relationships and as a result I don't really want them/agree with them. I just want to be happy with the person I like. I don't want him to fix anything.

    Maybe I should have worded it better, but I want to be able to feel comfortable in a relationship, rather than constantly thinking about the worst.
     
  4. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    People have a lot more control over what they think about and dwell on than we like to admit. If your mind naturally wanders to the bad and dark than you can choose to picture and, plan, and consider good as well. Simply because your mind goes in one direction by itself is no reason for you to let it stay there - that is a choice- like listening to depressing music when sad. You wanted a relationship for some reason so when you start thinking of all the negatives instead think on positives tha you like whether it is dinner out , romantic evening, or whatever and plan for the next one.

    So far as time alone- you need to allow for that and for space period- nothing wroong with throwing in a plan for an alone time or activity in your positive thinking as well and simply saying I need to get some time for myself- odds are your partner would like some time to do something on their own too so plan for that.