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So Helpless

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Wolfers, Mar 5, 2018.

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  1. Wolfers

    Wolfers Active Member

    I’m just feeling so helpless... I don’t think there is a way out of this all. I can’t die and I can’t fix it, I can’t do anything without someone hurting. I wish I could find some relief. I can’t, I must be terrible.
     
    Last edited: Mar 5, 2018
  2. sassy123

    sassy123 SF hugger Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    You are not terrible hugs.
     
  3. Winter Blues

    Winter Blues SF Supporter

    Hi Wolfers, do you have anyone you can talk to? Have you seen your doctor to see if medication would help. I have read your other post. Can you say more about yourself ... Please stay on this site and keep talking though. There is so much love, understanding and support here. You are a special person, definitely not terrible. Sending you a hug x
     
  4. Wolfers

    Wolfers Active Member

    I don’t have anyone in my immediate life that I will talk to. No, I haven’t seen a Dr and I don’t know what to say about myself...
     
  5. Winter Blues

    Winter Blues SF Supporter

    Then perhaps stay on this site and read other posts. I too have difficulty talking about myself but have found so much help by reading threads here that are similar in nature to my issues. There are a huge amount of folk better qualified than me to give you advice and people will respond. But I would suggest you see a doctor and tell him how you are feeling xx
     
  6. theedda

    theedda Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry you're feeling this way, but it does not make you terrible. Did someone say something to you lately that made you feel that way? Or is it coming from your own mind? Either way, it's not true. Life is complicated and difficult to deal with. Everyone feels confused and in pain, but some people are luckier with the support they have around them than others. I can't predict how your life will go, but, if you breathe and take some time off, I'm sure you'll come to find that not everything is lost.
     
  7. Wolfers

    Wolfers Active Member

    No one has said anything to me. I guess it’s just from my own mind..
     
  8. theedda

    theedda Well-Known Member

    In that case, remember that the only person whose standards you aren't living up to is yourself. Don't be so hard on yourself, you wouldn't be like that with a friend right? So why put all that pressure on yourself.
     
  9. Kiwi2016

    Kiwi2016 Forum Pro

    I'm so sorry that you are struggling right now...but please take to heart that you do matter and that you aren't alone as we are all here for you. Do you mind sharing a bit more what is going on with you? Sending you hugs.
     
  10. cofish

    cofish Member

    Hi Wolfers

    Not sure how to help you more without a bit of general info about your situation (I am very new here - few hours), but please remember about one very important thing. When you get yourself pushed into the dark corner, all seems hopeless cause all you can see is the problem in front, preventing you from thinking about anything not involved with it. What I have found out, is that we have the ability to drag ourselves from those holes, but to start doing that, we need a bit of fresh perspective with glimmer of hope we can cling to. If you have someone you can have an honest talk with, try to get his / her view on your situation. If you don't want to go into details, try to get a his / her response to its more generalized version in a casual manner. I happened to see myself as a pathetic fool, only for my friend to casually point out a few advantageous aspects of my personality and life, with such brutal honesty, that even I couldn't rebuke them. What also helps me is to get some sleep, though falling asleep itself is troublesome. It eases the burden of situation and allows me to eventually get a bit of a breathing room in my mind, so I can create a plan how to proceed forward. Remember that when your mind is tired, depression strikes harder. I know that when you are depressed it may be hard to get a good rest, but aim for it either way. The more rested your mind is, the more clearly you will perceive the situation and solutions to the issues.
    You said "I must be terrible". The way I see it it, it couldn't be more different. You are hurting, yet you still worry about hurting someone else. Most importantly, you feel helpless to the point of crying out loud, yet you still find strength and courage to seek help here. How many others would have found that strength? How many others would have thought about other people under such circumstances? How many others would still reach out for help? You still haven't given up, despite the situation. Take pride in that. You are most certainly not terrible, I am a stranger, and I can tell that after quick look at your post.

    Good luck. There are people willing to help if you are willing to share some of you problems with them.
     
  11. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi @Wolfers You are stronger than you are giving yourself credit for.

    Can I ask? Why exactly do you want to die? There must be some reasons you want to live, let them be stronger than the ones you want to give up on. While you are alive there is still hope.
    Did something in particular trigger you to feel this way? You can talk it out with us, we will not ever judge you.

    Best wishes :)
     
  12. Wolfers

    Wolfers Active Member

    I don’t know what to do. I recently left a bad/violent relationship and now I don’t have a home. I have a job, but I don’t make a lot.
     
  13. Wolfers

    Wolfers Active Member

    I don’t really want to die. There is a lot I want to do and see, but I don’t know what else to do.
     
  14. Kiwi2016

    Kiwi2016 Forum Pro

    I am so sorry as I can only imagine what that was like but hold onto that deep inner strength that you clearly have as you did get out of such a relationship and that took incredible courage and strength. I wondered are you able to reach out to some social services or a network of friends/family perhaps for some support to help you through this transition as you re-build your life after such a bad relationship. Sending you hugs.
     
  15. Walker

    Walker Everything Zen Staff Member Safety & Support SF Social Media SF Supporter

    Most suicidal people don't want to die, they just want to stop feeling whatever pain they are in.
    You don't say what it is that has you feeling this way so much. You left a bad relationship so that's a good thing. It may be rough in the beginning but in the end it'll be better. You said your housing situation is a wreck right now so that's not good. Is that what has you so messed up?
     
  16. Wolfers

    Wolfers Active Member

    I think so, I didn’t have a ton to worry about when I was with my husband and now I have to do everything and it stresses me out. I guess I’m just used to being lazy and not being a responsible adult.
     
  17. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi @Wolfers If you are finding keeping on tops of things difficult then I'd recommend maybe seeing a social worker for the extra support. I don't know if a social worker is the correct person but its what springs to mind. In 2018 there is zero need to suffer in silence. Sorry you are hurting so much.
     
  18. Walker

    Walker Everything Zen Staff Member Safety & Support SF Social Media SF Supporter

    I definitely wouldn't phrase anything like that. Divorce is tough, not too much is harder than that. You are enmeshed with this other creature and then you have to extricate yourself from that role. It's a big thing. So saying that you just need to suck it up or "be an adult" is really minimizing it. I don't mean it that way and if that's how you feel on the regular then you should be easier on yourself. It's not "lazy" either but you do have to start somewhere - take baby steps and move ahead. You're gonna make it through this one way or the other so just *go*. Little steps are still progress. We're behind you. Ask for advice if you want to know where to start or need help finding services, ok? We got you.
     
  19. Wolfers

    Wolfers Active Member

    I’m not divorced. I wouldn’t even know how to start the paperwork on a divorce..
     
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