So I THOUGHT I was doing better...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by DatAlgorithm, Jun 27, 2015.

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  1. DatAlgorithm

    DatAlgorithm Well-Known Member

    turns out every time I'm ever happy and seeing improvements in my life, it's like that drunk at the party whose only happy when sauced up. Once the liquor wears off of them, things turn back to "dear god, I sure made an ass outta myself..." Turns out I'm an ugly Beavis and Seth Green and Chris Kattan looking piece of shit with acne on his body so bad that sometimes he almost gets infections. It hurts really bad. I have decided to kill myself; I won't give details, but I can't keep living like this. My life is fucking ruined because the only shit in life that makes me happy requires that I don't have a fucking pizza body and I can't even be freed of that. No thanks to my parents who created me the ugly piece of shit with bad skin and is stupid. I don't hate them, but I eternally hate what they did by bringing me into this world.

    Don't count on me being alive to see 2016; that would be the best case scenario for me to die within the next 6 months.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 27, 2015
  2. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Hey there, let me tell you a little secret...
    Beauty, comes from the inside, and im not talking about some cheap words said to desperate people, but a true fact.
    1. Happy people are appealing to others, no matter how they look, i mean look at Hopkins (The professor)
    2. Your skin problems, its a hormonal thing, it will go away eventually
  3. Prinnctopher's Belt

    Prinnctopher's Belt Antiquities Friend SF Supporter


    Most people are not unattractive. Ive seen your pictures and I could identify you if I saw you in public; youre not ugly and your acne is not even apparant. Ive talked to you before; youre not stupid. You form coherent thoughts plus youre a talented musician of sorts.


    Lots of people have acne, scars, "blemishes," or some other skin or body issue going on. I understand the hits at one's body image that comes with it. There are topical medicines that are effective and can heal skin problems if used regularly, along with getting help for habits that worsen skin problems such as picking, and help for anxiety that may cause bad habits.

    I just told another poster the same thing. If there is help that could change things, then its a lot better than losing a potentially brighter future over a common and superficial skin problem that can be repaired.

    Im'a go ahead and count on you being alive to see next year. Enough people have needlessly died already as it is.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 27, 2015
  4. DatAlgorithm

    DatAlgorithm Well-Known Member

    1. More sappy-ass cliches... used to "make people feel better" by lying to their face because they are fucking liars who can't handle the truth. Believe 'em if you want, but remember, lies don't solve ANYTHING unless you're a. a high-paid hustler or b. the federal government.
    2. I'm 27. That "hormonal thing" has long past.
  5. DatAlgorithm

    DatAlgorithm Well-Known Member

    I really appreciate your compliments and trying to make me feel better Prinn... I really do... but I know the truth that I'm ugly and I ain't shit. Everyone around me knows deep down too (I have been picked on mercilessly for my body acne) so usually they just end up feeling sorry for me, sometimes to the point they won't even say it. Nature knows I shouldn't live, and my repulsiveness and disgusting conditions are just further validation as to why I shouldn't procreate (which is also ok... I have no intent on ever getting married or having children; I could NEVER forgive myself for forcing an innocent child into this shitty world like my short-sighted, naive, hypocritical parents did for way too many reasons to list.) My acne is largely GENETIC (thanks to my father, who like me, had HUGE dreams and a real palate for the quality things in life, but worked himself to a stroke and died) so unless I ever encounter the Jesus Christ Miracle Worker of dermatologists, I might be doomed to be alone and depressed for the rest of my useless life.

    If you wanna count on me to keep living, better start believing in miracles too. My death won't be needless; this planet is overpopulated as is thanks to childbirth being misconstrued to something of a "miracle." Like George Carlin said "Have these parents even THOUGHT about what the planet is gonna be like in 40 years? It's gonna be a big flaming ball of shit! That's what's gonna happen!" and that's exactly what's happening more and more every single day.
  6. Prinnctopher's Belt

    Prinnctopher's Belt Antiquities Friend SF Supporter

    I have lingering, permanent scarring from acne and I have face acne. Mine is genetic, too, and also hormonal and will likely deal with for the rest of my life. But I saw a dermatologist and Im able to keep it under control and look halfway decent when I go outside without any makeup but lipstick and eyeliner. My scars still keep me self conscious but theyre scars, theyre part of who I am, they shouldnt be a big deal in matters of intimacy if its with a nonjudgmental person who cares about me.

    Yeah, being at the beach and having to cover up is unpleasant, but thats what DermaBlend is for. You have this acne shit and its not that important or dysfigurin. You just have to take steps, drop the shame, see the doctor and start treating it. Be glad that there is medicine for it at least.

    Plenty of people deal with the same problems, youre not the only one.
  7. DatAlgorithm

    DatAlgorithm Well-Known Member

    already tried the whole doctor shit. Was completely useless and a waste of 40 dollars on meds and creams and pills that did a whole lot of noting and arguably made it worse. Pretty much 95% of the time I ever saw a doctor for something, NOTHING was solved and it was just a waste of time I'll never get back. Pathetic part is I cured more acne ON MY OWN (and I'm a 3 time dropout mind you... compared to someone who went to med school) than from seeing a useless dermatologist. Sad part is the one thing I have in life that doesn't make me feel completely like shit requires that I don't have a bad complexion on my body/face in order to achieve it. Well, 2 more quotes; "god sure has a sense of humor" and "fate is not without a sense of irony."

    Fuck this life. I'm done. Just let me die.
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