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So I'm currently at a youth homeless shelter...

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by xoCherie, Feb 21, 2012.

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  1. xoCherie

    xoCherie Well-Known Member

    ....and it's pretty much because of the last two months. I came over to Australia to a living situation where my sister is in a domestic violent relationship and I had no idea about it. A week into it I come out of the show to him choking her on the bed, and of course I called the police. Hello, he's sitting on her chest and she's gone red for god's sake. That meant my sister and I got kicked out of the boyfriend's place. Four days later it's Boxing Day and I come home to see him at the new place. Supposedly he'd come around to drop off the money he owed my sister and food. He didn't leave until two weeks later when I called an ambulance because my sister was in such extreme period pain. He ony left because he freaked out that they'd call the cops for some reason. That time he was gone two days. He hasn't left since, and since then we've been kicked out of two places because of their constant fighting. I would go into detail but I really can't handle dealing with it.

    I'm only here because I couldn't deal with it and ended up ringing lifeline and got told that it's too unsafe for me to go home so here I am. I'm just wondering...should I move out and get out of this whole situation? I know I need to look after myself first but I'm scared for her. Plus I've tried to move out on my own and she called me a selfish bitch and just fought with me until my courgae gave out. I don't know what to do and outsider's view/input would help A LOT.

    I should probably add that it all made me suicidal yesterday and somewhat today, and that's another reason I'm not at the house we're staying at now for the next two nights.
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi Cherie...so glad you decided to share with us...the first and foremost obligation you have to yourself is to be safe...sounds like your sister is older...she has the responsibility to care for herself, and if she cannot, you can report the situation again, but do not remain in a situation where you are at risk...it makes such sense for you to feel so awful, but know there are so many people who have gotten a rough start and have made a good life...are you finishing your education? Education is a long term insurance policy. Do what you can online or as a GED or such to get your high school diploma...I know it is hard to think of anything else when in your situation, but do try...it will give you a sense of freedom and worth...please keep posting and know there are many of us here to support you
  3. xoCherie

    xoCherie Well-Known Member

    Hey Sadeyes, yes I've finished my education c: Well...up to year 12. I wanted to do a career with horses but it went out the window when (shock horror!) I came over here and my sister decided for me that I should sell my art, then has been pressuring me since. But it's a hobby :/ horse riding's my passion and dream <3

    She was so...weird on Facebook. She stared out all nice and friendly, but then when my answers got vague threw in "M___ heard you talking to a friend about moving out. Is that true?" Then when I didn't reply was like "Don't fucking ignore me Cherie!" :/ But I can't just say it over facebook. She'll throw my stuff onto the front porch. I'm not kidding, she has to her boyfriend when she actually had the guts to kick him out...he came back two hours later with his tail between his legs and the cycle continued

    I need to break the cycle
  4. Thirsty

    Thirsty Member

    I am certainly no expert in this field, nor am I familiar with the Australian justice system, but it would seem that some type of order of protection would be available if she wanted it.

    I too, much like other men (and women for that matter) have seen my sister suffer at the hands of ex boyfriends. Sadly I can say that what I said in the first sentence tells it all if she wanted it Searching this forum, talking to others, even professionals will agree, that it is nearly impossible to help someone who doesn't want it. What I mean is if you were to exhaust every resource in getting her out of this relationship, she may simply seek out another that is similar.

    Love her. Care for her. And make sure she knows it. Let her know that once SHE makes the decision that you will be waiting with open arms to comfort her and love her. That's all anyone could really do.

    </My 2 Cents>
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