So i'm reaching out for help!!!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by 1izombie, Aug 9, 2009.

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  1. 1izombie

    1izombie Well-Known Member

    I'm at work crying uncontrollably I feel like shit and the only thing I'm thinking about is when is a good date to kill myself... I'm falling apart ....I dont wanna go thru this shit over and over again, but it always comes back to this...idk what to do...I'm trying to fight thru this but its not working...oh well wtf is wrong with me....Bleh..i was feeling better...i give up
     
  2. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    Hey Steve, Just take a breath hun. What brought on the tears? Did something happen at work, did you start thinking about something, I remember you said you were feeling better, what made you fall apart? We're here for you okay please don't do anything, please don't give up.
     
  3. Polar

    Polar Account Closed

    Hi 1izombie,

    I'm sorry to hear about what you've been experiencing. It must be awful :(

    I understand how you feel. When I go to work I shake, sweat and stutter uncontrollably due to a stressful work environment. When I'm there, all I think about is how I can get out of it and sometimes the only way seems to be what you're thinking.

    Maybe try thinking of something that will take your mind of your recurrent thoughts. Every night I go to the shops after work and I know it seems strange but I try to think about this instead. I'm actually planning on going to the shops tonight and instead of thinking about killing myself I'm trying to concentrate on this experience which no doubt will be positive.

    Also, perhaps think about what is causing you to feel this way and try to address it. I know at work I'm bullied and the way I try to combat this is by concentrating on what I have to do and being around people I know who are going to pick me up.

    It's terrible when you feel better and then worse. You think you have gone a hundred steps backwards but remember, you've probably taken a thousand steps forward as well.

    I hope you're feeling better soon and try to stay positive. You're more than worth it.

    Take care.

    Kind regards,

    Polar
     
  4. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Dude I am IMing someone right this minute about the ups and the downs and well it aint easy that is for sure. Hell makes matters worse often is you tend to feel crazy and feel so hopeless about it all
    so please let us know what is going on hun we are here for you...
    Love and hugs B
     
  5. triggs

    triggs Account Closed

    :hug: steve! please don't do anything to hurt yourself hun! you know you can talk to me if you need to :arms: what's made you feel like this? have you been triggered in some way?
    i hope you feel better again soon :cuddle2:
    xx
     
  6. 1izombie

    1izombie Well-Known Member

    I'm more stable ... not crying anymore...I still feeling overwhelmed and trying to fight it but having a hard time of it...I feel ugly and useless, and like a fucking waste of space and unloveable and i fear that I will always be that way and feel that way and its just fucking frustrating how I can be good one moment and then total shit the next moment...im tired of the ups and downs..hmmmmm
     
  7. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Steve you just expressed so much of how I feel right now I feel hypocritical replying but just wanted you to know I read what you wrote and my heart goes out to you. I would not say I am depressed per se but feel as you do - ugly and unlovable so I will tell you what I will love you if you love me?

    Sorry your are hurting and hope your heart's pain is eased soon and sorry I am not much help right now.

    Love and hugs B
     
  8. 1izombie

    1izombie Well-Known Member

    U dont have to say sorry....just knowing ur here helps...and of corse I love u <3<3<3<3
     
  9. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    Steve I love you too!!! :hug:
    You're not ugly or useless or unlovable. I get the ups and the downs all the time as well and I hate it, sick of the mood swings, they're so fucking tiring. :(
    I hope some ups come for you soon. x
     
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