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When I was a kid, I wanted to be a professional boxer. Now I'm trying to be a vegetarian.
Just because we did something in the past does not mean it should hold us in the future. Things change. Choose to live, my friend. You'll find lots of bad things here in life, but I think the good things are worth it.
I think its good you chickend out. Your giving yourself another chance at the wheel. This time, try pointing yourself in the right direction instead of the wrong. You must have something holding you back, even though you may not know what it is, and be thankful for it.
Give yourself time to recuperate from the other night, and move forward to try to find that last bit of hope for you.
I do understand, Broken. That does not mean I necessarily agree. I have also felt/feel the same way as you have been from reading your post. I am glad you chickened out of it. I see it as being courageous though. It takes more courage to hang on and fight this battle than it does to give in to the horrible feelings. Stay strong. As you stated, you have a husband and daughter. your daughter does need you. Take care . :hug:
i think that if you don´t want to be saved, you want to stay alive because you need to see your doughter grow up and wach out for her, to listen to her when she start dating with someone, etc. i know you like to see when she smiles to you and help her to do her homework, and i think you don´t want to miss that...but that´s what i think...i don´t know if i´m wrong but i think you should live for her.