I have got so many reasons to get my shit together. I am selfish.
I tucked my 2 beautiful children in to bed last night and that still did not stop me from thinking about packing up all of my stuff and stepping out on them and my husband.
I think they would be better off without me. I think I hold my husband back from a lot, and that my kids will grow up happy and healthy if I were not in the picture. I am sick, depressed, thinking about suicide. Thinking that I would be doing my husband and my kids a favor by taking my own life now and getting out while they (the kids) are still so young. They would stand a better chance at this cruel world without me complicating things for them.
Because they are not enough?? I have no idea why I can't get my shit together and be there for them like they need me to be. I am just tired of existing at this point. I keep thinking I am ready to do it. I can xxxx this time, but I am just a little hesitant. I am afraid of the outcome. I am uncertain what happens after I take my last breath...
I tucked my 2 beautiful children in to bed last night and that still did not stop me from thinking about packing up all of my stuff and stepping out on them and my husband.
I think they would be better off without me. I think I hold my husband back from a lot, and that my kids will grow up happy and healthy if I were not in the picture. I am sick, depressed, thinking about suicide. Thinking that I would be doing my husband and my kids a favor by taking my own life now and getting out while they (the kids) are still so young. They would stand a better chance at this cruel world without me complicating things for them.
Because they are not enough?? I have no idea why I can't get my shit together and be there for them like they need me to be. I am just tired of existing at this point. I keep thinking I am ready to do it. I can xxxx this time, but I am just a little hesitant. I am afraid of the outcome. I am uncertain what happens after I take my last breath...
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