I am in so much emotional pain, I feel like I'm stuck. Death would be such a great relief but I can't leave my mother, brother and sister with so much grief. I just can't seem to live. I feel bad constantly except sometimes when I'm studying, really concentrating on something, or take huge amounts of drugs. no replies needed, i just wanted to say this. I really am desperate. Tonight I'll throw two dice and if it's two threes I'll do it. I pray to God but the sky is empty, as Sylvia Plath wrote.