I just know it, I'm going to get drunk tonight, going to a party, but whenever I get as freaking scared as I am like right now I just want to drink it all away, I know it's gonna happen, ffs, why don't I have a shrink, k, I admit, I have a problem, now get rid of it! Getting mad I think, there's nothing threatening, yet, aargh! I feel like killing myself tonight, with all the booze, it won't kill me though, I know it but I'll likely try it anyway. WHY! I musn't kill myself because certain people asked me not to. I do want to though, but, aw :'( I couldn't just tell my parents now could I?8!