and yet, i did not do it. I sat there, car running, and then wimped out, tears running down my face,howling in pain, gasping for air, and I could not do it. What in the world do I have to live for? Nothing. And yet, I am still here. Even though it hurts so badly to live. I am disappointed, confused and frustrated. And will try again, when I am calmer, and less likely to let my emotions get in the way.