so simple

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by swimmergirl, Oct 4, 2009.

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  1. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    and yet, i did not do it. I sat there, car running, and then wimped out, tears running down my face,howling in pain, gasping for air, and I could not do it. What in the world do I have to live for? Nothing. And yet, I am still here. Even though it hurts so badly to live. I am disappointed, confused and frustrated. And will try again, when I am calmer, and less likely to let my emotions get in the way.
     
  2. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    Stay with us. Post anytime you need to. :hug:
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You want to live you want the pain to go away Please reach out for help get councilling call your therapist get on meds you want the pain gone not your life gone.
     
  4. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

    .

    I guess that it's your emotions that are making you want to do it in the first place! So they're really on your side, if they are stopping you from going ahead - and can you remember when you were sitting there crying whether maybe it would have helped to have let someone else know how and why you were feeling like that, exactly in that moment, telling them or showing them I don't know, something that might have broken the spell?
     
  5. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    I sent my doctor an email late last night about what happened and what i was feeling, and I got no response. Really makes me feel like I don't matter. I am so lonely, I really do not want to live anymore all alone. I don't think death could be any worse than this...nothingness.
     
  6. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    Please call the doctor's office and make an appointment. He may not have checked his email yet. :hug:
     
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