So the last friend I had just turned there back on me.....

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by impulse617, Jul 17, 2009.

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  1. impulse617

    impulse617 Well-Known Member

    .....just like every1 else lmfao!!!! Why did I think she would be different? I guess I have nothing to really live for. I always said I'd rather die then be alone and I really mean that....I guess its only a matter of time now, depression is just ripping me apart and I can't fuckin take it anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  2. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Hi I am sharing your pain...I came on to write about how I lost a friend yesterday and saw your post.
    I don't know what the circumstances are surrounding your friend, or rather ex-friend so don't know what to say about that but there are lots of people here you could get to know and are great friends.

    I know SF friend are not the same but funny thing is that I made a few friends here and now there are two people in real life that seem to want to be my friend. I really think there is a connection-maybe its because I don't look so much to real life people for understanding of my depression and such so that has opened the door to being friends as they don't feel this cloud of needing to connect that I had-I still have that need but not I come here for understanding now.

    Will I don't want to make this thread about me, I want to offer my experience so maybe you see there is hope.
    Please let us know more details so we can offer you support...being alone is no way to live I agree it ain't no life but I bet there is hope and ways to get good friends back in your life.

    Take care and thanks for posting it helped me to hear I was not alone in my thoughts/feelings

    B
     
  3. Jemi200

    Jemi200 Well-Known Member

    I havent had friends for 8 months in 3 intervals of my life. I have none right now.

    I know how you feel and worse. When it's a friday night, I stay home. No one to hang out with.

    You aren't alone, and feel better.
     
  4. thepainwithin

    thepainwithin Well-Known Member

    i don't deny having suicidal thoughts, and i don't deny that i get extremely lonely and depressed. but things could always be worse. i just a saw an episode of cops where a guy got arrested for burglary, kidnapping and assault with a deadly weapon. this guy...is going to be in prison for a long time. he won't be able to do as he pleases, he'll be stuck in a cell all but 2-3 hours a day for the next...ohh...15 years.

    now i'm not here to tell you that you aren't hurting and that you don't have it bad, and perhaps i used an extreme example, but I guess what i'm trying to get at is... you are a lot like me, you are very lonely, very depressed, and by the sounds of it, very suicidal. but i want to tell you what my friend told me:

    the brain is a powerful tool. you can, at any point in your life, change your habbits, change your thought process, change your outlook on life. the only problem that most people face is dealing with the work ahead. knowing that you will still be in the dark and still be depressed while wishing you could have instant results is crushing. you're so ready to be happy, to have your life turned around, and you're doing all the work you can to make a step in the right direction, but the process is slow.

    you aren't too sure what you have to do to get from point A to B? buy some books. if you are hardpressed at making friends, like i am, go buy The 48 Laws of Power and The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene. Ya, these books focus on sexual issues, but they also have a deeper message: how to make friends and how to be the life of the party and the person everyone wants to be with. i'm not sure what every issue is you are dealing with, but there is a book for everything you can think of.

    don't be intimidated at the amount of the work you have to do. i still can't even comprehend at how much work i am going to do, hell i'm considering the army to straighten my life out.

    it's hard to keep your head up when the weight of the world is holding it down.
     
  5. impulse617

    impulse617 Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the support everybody....it means a lot, but I just don't know how I'm going to get through this. How am I gonna go on??? Life is over for me....I just can't contine to live like this, its all to much for me to handle, suicide is the only option and I have to take it....there's nothing for me in this world, I've already made up my mind
     
  6. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    you can choose to stay here and get the support you need from us. You are not alone truly we all support each other we care about each other. There will be another time perhaps for another friend but you won't know if you don't stick around. The pain does decrease in time talk with us vent rant what ever you want but stick with us okay
     
  7. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    Hi Impulse,
    I'm the same, I have no friends and the friends I did have, were incapable of being friends at all.
    Sometimes you can have people in your life who are just that... people in your life, not true friends.
    You are not alone, we are all here for you and I know it's not exactly the same but if it helps, I am taking this time alone to get better and to try and take the right steps to fixing myself.
    Sometimes when people are around they make it more difficult to do so because they are dependant on you and you may end up being dependant on them also.
    You can make more friends, people who really care about you and people who will stick by you through the hard times.
    When you're stronger and more independant, there is nothing worse than the fear of being alone, but taking the time to get over that fear and learning that being alone is not as scary as it sounds will make you an even better friend when you find new ones.

    You can get through this impulse617, there are billions of people in this world just waiting to care about you, but you've got to stop and remember you need to be the most important person to you first and not be so dependant on them. You will become a better person for it, believe me.
    Please don't give up, suicide is not the answer. stay and fight, we'll help you!
     
  8. daredevil22r

    daredevil22r Member

    I came here looking for a reason NOT to kill myself. Just talking about it is a step in the right direction. I'm not saying that I am no longer thinking about it. I tried 2 nights ago and failed. Back to life, I feel even more depressed. But know what, people here are genuine. Not so called friends who tell you what they think you need to hear. I've heard it all. What about him, or her, or your family, or your dog, your car, your nephews... The list goes on and on.
    Only 1 person said "what about you? Your future life? Don't you want to find someone and grow old with them?"
    I think this person, whom I hardly knew hit it perfect. It wasn't about others, it was about me. She has helped me through this. But I still fall into depression and in a moment of weakness, who knows what I do.
    So just keep your head up. Think about what you want to do and where you see yourself in a few months. Think possitive. What do you need to make you happy?
     
  9. triggs

    triggs Account Closed

    :hug: here if you want to talk hun :heart:
    triggs xx
     
  10. thepainwithin

    thepainwithin Well-Known Member

    Create a life for yourself. Join a club, an organization, get a new job. There are new ways to meet people. Odds are if you truely connected with 1 person there are going to be hundreds, if not thousands out there who share your views, your thoughts, your outlook on life and you will be able to connect with them.

    Friends are NOT a neccessity in life. They are a luxury. Boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands and wives are not a neccessity, they are a luxury. Just hang on, and get out and try to do something.

    I sit inside most days, I don't go out on weeks. Last Halloween I spent in my dorm room alone 300 miles away from my nearest friend while everyone else on campus partied. But I got through it.

    Friends will come naturally just by talking to people. Don't force it and don't act needy. You don't sit down and connect with someone in minutes. It takes days, months to build a trust with a friend you can connect with.
     
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