so this girl doesn't love me, but I love her

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by solost22, Mar 15, 2012.

  1. solost22

    solost22 Member

    so me and this girl are really good friends. We have fun together and we tease each other once and a while. While last night I texted her that I love her and She kept trying to convince me that I don't but I really do. Than I told her "I know you don't love me, but I really love you" and her response was "I don't know what to say" than this morning I told her that we should just act like I never said that to you. all she said was "I feel like bitch." so now I feel awkard and confused around her. any advice?
     
  2. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Love is a heavy word for sure, and then to tell someone that you know they don't love you? Love to people has many meanings. It sounds like to me that you care for this girl, and it sounds like to me that she cares for you back. If you were to look at that as love. Then yes she does love you and you love her. Now if you just want her physically then I am afraid it isn't love, but lust. I would apologize and talk with this girl and tell her in a more revealing manner that you meant to say that you care a lot about her. I doubt she would argue that point. Then I would apologize for accusing her for not caring about you, and assure her that you know she cares about you. If she truly did not care she wouldn't ever talk to you again and she would run as far and as fast as she could to get away from you. Right?
    That is the great thing about relationships. We all goof, and we all eat crow. This is a normal way people deal with one another. Next time explain what you mean a little clearer so that you are able to communicate what you truly feel. She probably thought you had meant something else entirely. Communication is the key to all relationships. Knowing how you feel, and how to express what you feel is needed on your part if you want to be understood and heard. I hope this helps.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 15, 2012
  3. Ldub20

    Ldub20 Well-Known Member

    Maybe if you give it time she'll learn to love you. But I know it is disheartening to be unable to make another person love you. That's free will and life, both of which are bullshit. If she can't see it, I hope another woman can.
     
  4. Prinnctopher's Belt

    Prinnctopher's Belt Antiquities Friend SF Supporter

    Awkward for what? If you really loved her then it wouldn't matter that it's not reciprocated. What matters is that she knows, and you wanted her to know, so whether it's reciprocated is irrelevant. Don't pretend as if it never happened. Be glad that you expressed how you feel about her, and since she doesn't feel the same, you have to respect that even though she doesn't feel the same way, that you still love her and want to remain close friends. Obviously she isn't at the same level in this friendship as you are, so leave it there and don't hold your breath waiting for her to catch up.
     
  5. gloomy

    gloomy Account Closed

    This is pretty good advice.

    There are some things you can't unsay… but just because the situation exists and is admittedly difficult, it doesn't mean that you can't deal with it maturely.
     
  6. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Unrequited love always sucks, but if she doesn't feel the same way about you, there's not much that can be done. Maybe she will feel differently about you in the future, but if not, you should find someone who will love you the same way you love them. You had a great friendship and that shouldn't change just because she rejected your feelings. I don't think she meant to hurt you, and you should talk to her about the situation.
     
  7. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    I completely agree with this. Especially the first part. If you really love her, it should be irrelevant whether or not it's reciprocated.
     
  8. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    There are few things in the world, if any at all, that hurt more than unrequited love. I completely understand how it feels.
    Sigh..... :(