So Tired of Hurting

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This is the worst place I have ever been in in my life. I am so tired of hurting, I want to leave this world. I have always dealt with depression and I know it is hard to see past the pain right now. I know it can get better but I really don't buy it right now. 4 weeks ago, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. I realized I have lived all for him and forgotten myself, been unhappy for so long. I gave myself 4 weeks to move cross country by myself. I fell back in love with an ex-boyfriend and now I have screwed that up too. EVERYTHING hurts and I am so sick of it. People I know have lost loved ones to suicide and after that I realized it could no longer be an option for me. I feel that I have run out of options. Thinking what if I make it look like an accident? I do have pills here, just not sure they are enough. But I am alone here until at least tomorrow night maybe later. I can't kill myself, someone please help me. I don't want to hurt my family like that. I am so alone. And I never want to let anyone in again. ever.
I can't deal with the constant pain and tears, I just can't. What other option is there?? I just want to be put in a coffin in the ground.

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
Option is to call a crisis line they will get you help hun or go to hospital and get some help there to calm your mind You can move forward hun it will take time but with support you can okay. Call the crisis line and just talk hun it helps hugs


Staff Alumni
Good luck moving cross country safely! :hug: I struggle with depression too, so I can relate a little; it's easy for me to get overwhelmed by events in life. With care...Mr. A
Just want to thank communities like this. I was out of options when I came here and just started typing and reading what others had written. I am out of crisis mode for this moment. May come back late at night or tomorrow, but now I can hold on til tomorrow. This time for me is far from over, I will be back on this forum. thank you for being here. Grateful.


Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense
earthsucks, I'm really glad you found SF! As Mr. A said, sometimes life events feel overwhelming. I hope you find you can settle and feel better soon. :hug:
Do NOT try to hurt yourself w/pills, trust me! I've tried (unsuccessfully) twice to kill myself it only results in having your stomach pumped and embarassment! This sounds corny but just SLEEP on it, please. Every day I live in pain and agony and my life is a constant struggly...I made a commitment NOT to hurt people I love by killing myself...take it ONE MINUTE at a time if you have to...please you are valuable, don't hurt yourself.
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