It starts with three guys. One, I have loved from the moment I met him. We are very good friends, but nothing more. He has a girlfriend, and has for longer than we've known each other. I've accepted it is not going to turn into anything more. He knows me better than anyone else, maybe even myself. A second, I used to have a thing for, back when he wanted nothing to do with me. Now the roles have reversed. He is a hard person to say no to, even though I don't actually feel the same way any longer. And the third, I work with. I am starting to really like him. He is very sweet, and respectful; addressing his elders as Sir or Miss. I am beginning to wonder if he feels the same, but it is not exactly the time or place to ask when we are working. Also, he is black and my family can be racist. This kid knows very little about me, which I kind of like. I am tired of being treated with kid hands by guys who think I am going to go off myself at any moment.