So what's going on here?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by TheLonelyAloePlant, Jul 5, 2011.

  1. TheLonelyAloePlant

    TheLonelyAloePlant Well-Known Member

    I just got my first boyfriend (I'll call him F) at the ripe old age of 16. He'd apparently had a crush on me since freshman year in high school and didn't have the courage to fess up until senior year. We talked for a few weeks and decided to pair up a couple days ago. I told one of my closest guy friends (S), since as far as I know, we don't have any romantic feelings for each other. When I told him that me and F were dating, he started answering in very short answers to my texts and IMs. He keeps snapping at me over petty things like web comics I don't like, how to hold a flag, how I don't like the anime he likes, and other stupid stuff like that. Before me and F went on our date, S was telling me that he was happy for me, etc, but once I told him that me and F were dating, he became very bitter toward me.
    How am I supposed to confront S about his behavior without him getting pissed at me? He's acting a bit childish for being 20, like someone took away his toy.
    What do I do now?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 5, 2011
  2. The Unforgiven

    The Unforgiven Well-Known Member

    hun you can expect the same behavior at 10, 20, 30 or 40, men dont grow up lol.
    he's obviously very possessive for a best friend, but is it possible that youve been neglecting him too? he might be getting annoyed with that? and theres always a teensy possibility that he liked you and never told you?..
     
  3. The Unforgiven

    The Unforgiven Well-Known Member

    an btw, your avatar is ADORABLE!! :hug:
     
  4. TheLonelyAloePlant

    TheLonelyAloePlant Well-Known Member

    I talk to him plenty, but S is becoming very short with me. Also thanks for the compliment on my avatar.
     
  5. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    Idk. Some guys hold out wanting someone but dont let that show, especially with close friends. Like if youre single youre open, he's open, but he's not persuing the matter, letting things go on as they are for whatever reason. He'll open up to you in slight suddle ways, letting you have the opportunity vice verca. But when you start dating, maybe in his eyes that personal connection is not so personal anymore. He could come up with any number of justifications to begin to feel a friction by opening up to you. Im not too sure why he's giving you friction, perhaps he really likes you or perhaps he just feels that the time you two share isn't so special anymore, that youre spending and sharing that same sort of time with your new bf, and that's taking away from the uniqueness he wants between you too.

    Idk, i think you could write a book on the possibilities. To be honest, some guys really need a stability in some form. Perhaps the lines have been blurred. I'd get your position to eacho of them sorted in your head and heart, then just simply ask him straight up in a calm friendly way what's up. No matter what it's your life, so you can date anyone without having to get flack from your closest friends. At the sametime, he is your closest guy friend, so it really is worth it to talk to him. He's stewing on something daft, wether it be a crush or a fear or whatever. Better to get it out in the open or find a way to get him to feel comfortable with u again. But if he's picking at you? No dont stand for that. He's just fumbeling :S
     
  6. TheLonelyAloePlant

    TheLonelyAloePlant Well-Known Member

    So he's angry because even though he didn't like me, that I'm not open in case he does in the future?
     
  7. xXWhateverItTakesXx

    xXWhateverItTakesXx Forum Buddy

    Ignore him hun. You need to focus on you and your bf.

    That's all that matters. It's just a guy trying to be a pain for whatever reason. Don't let him get to you two :hug: xx
     
  8. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    well i dont know :) Im just throwing a possibility out there. But i wouldnt summarise it ever like that :p In the end you'll only really know if u call him out on it or, ignore him and wait for him to get over himself. It's your life to live. He has no say and cant treat u poorly because he has an issue with you or some other reason.