This is going to sound stupid but i need some helpful advice. When i was 15 i really was so close to ending my life and you guys helped rehabilitate me. I'm 20 in July and haven't had these thoughts for years, until now. I don't know what really triggered it but i really do think i hate my physical appearance. I went on the Mini-Pill because my time of the month made me really ill and as a result (i think) i never seem to feel full when eating. I get hungry so much faster than i used to and have put on roughly a stone and a half since starting them a year ago. I also have ridiculously bad skin, it's either massive pores or a ton of blackheads. Depressing i know. I have stretch marks on my thighs and hips from my rapid weight gain which i really hate. The main problem though, seems to be something i noticed a few days ago. I have 2 deep wrinkles on my forehead and like i said, i'm only 19. I think it's because i raise my eyebrows a lot (not sure why and thinking about stopping only makes me do it more!!) and i just feel so crap and like my life is already passing me by and all these things are irreversible so why bother? The last thing i have a problem with is caffeine. You might laugh it off as a coffee addiction but it's not. I think i'm addicted to 'energy drinks' and i literally pick some up while shopping without even thinking about it. I know this is bad for my weight and skin but it seems too hard to stop and i don't want to tell anyone else because i feel stupid. I wouldn't say i'm going to commit suicide tonight but the feelings are there. Too much irreversible aesthetic stuff happening and i feel like chancing it and ending everything for the hope of a 'do-over' might be the better option.