i know i havent been here for a while. i started dating this guy i met a year ago (we just recently started talking again). And i tried to get him to open up to me and he wont. i mean he hardly talked to me at all in general. i really liked him a year ago but he's changed into a scared little crybaby. so i kept trying to push him to talk to me and open up. finally i told him that we should break up if he dosen't want to talk to me.... so he did. he claimed it was my fault the reason we broke up. now im trying to get him back. i have no clear idea why. i think its because i have no friends and he's the only guy i have since my ex went to prison. i guess i cling to him for fear of being alone because im a loser and dont want to be alone again. so we talked a little bit and i gave him time to think. he makes me feel like shit because he dosent want to talk me. but i feel so empty and alone right now all i do is cry and cut myself. im all alone, i dont have friends to talk to or support me like he does. i know that getting rid of him is the best thing for me but you have to understand my situation. i have no friends, no job or a way to get out and actively do anything from this small town im stuck in. im not like most people my age. im socially awkward almost blind. i liked him a lot a year ago and he isn't the same. i want to stay with him maybe more for desperation and fear of being all alone again so right now i feel so miserable and i want to kill myself but im too much of a pussy to do it. any advice? i dot know what to do. i hate this world so much right now. im such a loser. p.s. im sorry for the all lower caps, when im upset or depressed i dont care to type correctly, i know that sounds dumb but its something ive always done, i dont care to put forth the effort to be precise with my typing.