Is it normal for me to be coming hyper-aware of social expectations in my 20's? When I was a teenagers, I wasn't concerned with this sort of thing as much. I just really didn't care what people thought of me. Now, its one of the most obvious aspects of society and human nature to me, and I'm more cynical as a result of it. One of these social perceptions I've come to know is speech rate. Some would describe my speech rate as being slower than average. It really sucks for job opportunities, because the assumption is that its a soign of low intelligence. Maybe it is in the area of vocabulary related faculties, but that's not the only type of intelligence. i took an IQ test and got a score of 112, and it wasn't one of those hokey facebook tests either. As far as thinking of words, its not so hard. I just have trouble translating my thoughts to my mouth. There's some sort of disconnect. I need to slow down so that I don't start slurring my words. It hasn't really done good for me in job interviews, nor social settings. At my college, there was a candle light vigile being held for a friend of mine who had killed himself. I was preparing a speech, and this guy told me to write it out. He was in the middle of telling me that I have a tendency of jumbling up my words and then said that he wasn't really that good at public speaking either to take back what he just started to say. Another social perception I've come to be aware of is being single. If you're single and in your twenties, people automatically think you're some sort of loser or pervert or gay. I'm tired of people asking me if I''m gay. It really gets on my nerves. There is nothing wrong with homosexuality, but I'm tired of that being the assumption about me. Maybe its because I cross my legs in the more comfortable style of laying my right thigh over my left inner thigh and not on the knee cap. Someone asked me once, "dude how can you cross your legs like that. Doesn't that hurt". First of all, last time I checked, penises don't dangle between the legs. They're in the front of the pelvis. So, as long as a guy is wearing underwear and their balls are positioned on top of the legs, they shouldn't have a problem with the leg crossing style that is considered to be more effeminate. Besides, I think its just fake, macho bullshit to sit with your legs crossed in a hyper masculine way anyway. We get the point. You're trying to make people think you have a big dick by sitting down with your legs spread open. Its a part of the larger culture to make fun of single guys. I'm not going to knock people who choose to spend their time with a significant other, but aren't guys who have unwanted children and dump the girl after getting them pregnant losers too? When I was working at subway when I was 18, these douche bag 20 somethings would come in and hit on my 16 year old coworker. They also made some smug comments against me and my perceived lack of masculinity. Maybe I don't fit the the social norm of masculinity. Nonetheless, it was all rather sickening. She ended up getting knocked up by one of them and dumped. The common social perception is that the guy who has as many kids with as many different girls as possible is a lot less of a loser than the one who chooses to be chaste. I probably should start looking for a girlfriend. Maybe I just put too many standards on myself that I can't meet and expect all people to expect those standards when they really don't. I should probably just find a girl that's as fucked up as I am. lol. There were some redneck dudes I was sitting with on a couple occasions before class at the tables outside. I noticed how they talked down other people. Once there was a black dude standing around, and after he left, they made some ****** remark. On another occasion, this scrawny, beatnik, artsy dude, wearing tight pants and a turtle neck and walking with some girls to the cafeteria, passed by. Then they made some remark about how he looked like a twig and needed to be put on a strict diet of some cheese whiz. They were all muscular, but fat their selves. I stopped hanging around them, because I knew, with very strong certainty, that they probably talked about me behind my back or would talk about me behind my back if I hung out with them any longer. Are there any other social perceptions that people have noticed that people normally don't come out and say to people's faces but just kind of say it when they think you're not listening? I just hate that they are social norms. Maybe its an aspect of humanities inherent nature to be competitive. To compensate for one's sense of low self worth, there's a tendency to find people who display attributes that fall outside of the accepted norm and make a mockery of them to feel better about one's self. I don't really think life should be lived for other people. The point of life should be to live as healthy, fulfilling of an existence as possible and to do what you can to see to it that other people do too. I think people need to sort their instincts as an animal from their needs as a conscious being to be happy.Human nature doesn't have a tendency to be good to others, no more than a hurricane or any other force of nature has a tendency to be good to people.