There's an excitement beginning to grow within me which is starting to bring hope to something inside me that had been (sort of, to varying degrees) hopeless for so long. Because of my journey, it's not like I didn't know it in my head - but I could not make contact with it deep down because I realised that, in that particular part of me, there was still resistance. Irrational - because I didn't want it. But it was there, I had to face it. Then, a couple of days ago, when this lovely lady prayed for me, I was able to describe it a little bit - and I said "I know it is irrational, and that's why I hate it and want to be rid of it" - and she said words that have really, really, no - REALLY, helped me! She said - No, it isn't irrational, it is because it is easier to push away/(or walk away) rather than risk the hurt and pain of any more rejection - And I know she had hit the nail on the head. Sometimes it takes that - wisdom from another caring person who you know is not "out to get you". ----------------------------------------------- I just wanted to share that with all you lovely people this morning Can 'flesh this out' a bit further, maybe, later........ Am wondering, can anyone relate to it, does it make sense to others? This resistance that I didn't want, towards/against the Power that is for me, to help me heal, because it had originated pre-birth in the feelings department - has sort of had a life of its own, trying to bluff me that it was my real identity. However, like getting rid of a tree stump - first of all, digging around it to loosen it does help........get it in the right place for it to come out and the whole to be filled with better things Edit: just seen this 'Freudian slip' - I meant 'hole' of course!