A few thoughts I just want to put down; I feel very anxious around people. I worry what they think. I think everyone else thinks I'm crazy or stupid or they dislike me. I worry about what I said during the day. I worry I'm a nuisance. I feel like people look at me with fear, disgust, pity. I feel anxious when out on the street, like I'll see someone I know or used to know, or that people are looking at me and judging me. I feel guilt. A lot of guilt. I feel like everyone knows about my problems, people gossip about these things. I worry what people know and say behind my back. I think my extended family dislike me intensely, judge me, think I'm lazy, pathetic, weird. No one seems to be able to help me. Apparently I don't have any sort of illness. Apparently I just have a crap life. I don't have the same definition of a good life as most people, but I know it's my problems with my mood and so on that is preventing me from achieving what I want to do. It's so frustrating... And then I get asked if I dropped out of college as a rebellion against my parents? By my psychologist who obviously knows about my problems? Wtf? You think I'm pretending in some pathetic act of anger? You think I would sabotage myself like that? And it's so frustrating suffering intensely and then being told my 'experts' and self appointed experts in life that what I'm going through isn't that bad.