someone please help me

[greeneyes]

I attempted suicide in Oct. by taking a handful of sleeping pills. I was found by my sister, who called 911. I spent 24 hours in the ER and was then transported to a psych ward where I spent two weeks. I came out with the determination that I would never hurt the people I love again, but when I got home, that hope immediatly disappeared. I hate my life. I hate myself. I am lonely, even when I am not alone. I am seeing a psych, am on anti-depressants, but nothing seems to help. My home-life is a nightmare and there is nothing I can do to change it. The only solution I can come up with is death. I have felt this way for a year now, with no relief what-so-ever. I do have friends, I do have family, but I just can't seem to find any joy in life. I feel dead inside...just plodding through each day, so miserable and depressed. I can't imagine a lifetime of this. I just can't do it. There are circumstances that cause me to feel this way...a husband who says he doesn't love me anymore, huge financial burdens..It just seems really hopeless...A never ending nightmare. Is there an answer for me? I just don't know where to turn. Can someone please help me?

 

[RySp123]

perhaps a time out from it all to figure out if you do wish to pursue this path or perhaps try a whole different way of life........ husband, way to live, work etc....?

just a thought hun

granny

 

[gentlelady]

When we return to the same set of circumstances, is it a wonder the same feelings return. You must do something to change the environment you are in. The changes do not have to be significant in that they are huge, but maybe in small ways. You may start by hanging positive or inspirational sayings on your walls. You may do something that makes you feel good about yourself. You are a survivor. Revel in that. Find somethings to occupy your mind, a distraction. Maybe it is taking up a new hobby such as learning to play guitar or crafty things. If nothing around you changes, nothing inside does either. :hug:

 

[PrismBlack]

I suffered in this same way for almost five years of my life. I know I'm young and I don't have the life experience you might, but I was determined to make it through. When I attempted suicide or thought about it during those five years, people encouraged it, they told me I should and that I was worthless, and that actually made me stand up and try to prove them wrong by suffering through each day just waiting for things to get better.
I was wrong though, you see I was just waiting, I needed to be actively trying to make things better. That's what you need to do! You need to stand up and tell yourself that your life is important, if to no one but yourself, and you are going to take control and make it good.
Just start small, like gentlelady said, try to occupy yourself first. Develop a new hobby. Just don't get obsessed in it because that could leave you in an even more dangerous position than you are in now. After you take control of your life on a small scale like that, you can start pursuing a new path or fixing the one you're on, just as Endinday has said.
Just whatever you do, don't give up. Keep living every day and just start by finding small things to enjoy in it. :hug:

 

[zoebaby]

Okay I have a couple of suggestions for you. The last two years with my ex-husband I was so depressed, feeling really, really hopeless we were so unhappy, Im not that wonderful now but I feel much better since we seperated, being with someone who you are so unhappy with is awwful. A lot of the problem was because he was so mentally abusive, and playing so many games with me I could hardly think straight , thank god those days are over. My other suggestion is considering looking at the dose of the antidressant that you are on, I was on zoloft and they had to up my doses twice before I finally started feeling better. They started me off at 50 milligrams which didnt faze me but at 100 milligrams I was feeling great. I truly hope you feel better soon, take care.