someone please help me

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by SadDude1980, Mar 30, 2008.

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  1. SadDude1980

    SadDude1980 Well-Known Member

    I don't think I've ever felt so bad in my life. Feel like every key stroke, every word, and every breath takes extra effort. please can someone please talk to me. i'm in messenger, Let my wife see this I don't care. please.
  2. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    you can pm me whenever you need as i canĀ“t log into msn from work but i can come here
  3. Beret

    Beret Staff Alumni

  4. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Hi Ken. Have you considered talking to your wife about what is troubling you?
  5. SadDude1980

    SadDude1980 Well-Known Member

    I can't. See after the last fight we had (not physical, arguing in messenger while at work) she said, "that's it, I've had it" and she called me on the phone and was chain calling me an asshole - she's NEVER in the history of our marriage done that before.

    So then she said she was "taking action" right then and there. She got an order of protection filed against me and included my daughter in it even though in the list of "charges" there's nothing that says anything bad regarding my daughter. It says, "has he ever abused your daughter" - she puts "no". So it's a power trip basically. I can't talk to her now by law. It says absolutely no contact. Not when I miss her, not when I wanna see what's going on with us handling paying the bills and bowing out a little moe gracefully if that's what she wants to do, not nothing till the 9th of April after the court hearing regarding whether or not this protection thing stays in effect.

    Absolutely no contact. I've heard these painful words from another girl before who claimed to be "afraid of me" for no good reason other than the fact that she didn't want to get in trouble with her mother. Police told me this once and now they are again with my wife. I remember being so hurt and in so much agony. But it was nothing compared to this.

    It upsets me... but I'm realizing that I really miss my wife and love her. Despite the things WE have recently done to each other, I wanna try. Scheduled detox appointment for the first one they have, May 10. If I could talk to her I'd suggest we hit up a marriage counselor ASAP. But I can't till the 9th.

    sigh. In the meantime I'm crying myself to sleep, crying on the way to work, the way home from work, everytime I have to pass by our coffee shop, everytime I need help doing something in excel at work and realize I can't call her to help me anymore. Everything and anything reminds me of her. Everying :cry:
  6. lostpuppet

    lostpuppet Member

    You have a wife :smile:. I envy you.
  7. SadDude1980

    SadDude1980 Well-Known Member

    I used to envy people who had wives and girlfriends too. Then I got one and was like, "YAY, I'm not part of that sad crowd anymore!" Now I feel like I've been thrown back in and I don't know how to cope with it :(
  8. :hug: :hug: :hug: Ken
  9. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Sorry Ken, I didn't realize that the situation with your wife was so bad. I agree that marriage counseling is a good idea, to at least see if you can fix your marriage. Please hang on to the hope that you can reconcile your marriage and have your wife and daughter back. I really hope that it works out for you. Why did she get the restraining order in the first place? :hug:
  10. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    No great words of wisdom...just wanted to send hugs, J
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