You know it is weird I was feeling just fine up until 30 or so minutes ago. Then I just snapped and broke down... mentally. I was all set and motivated to go out for a night of Pump It Up. However Now my mind is composing suicide notes and planning to used the noose in my closet. Everything that I have done. My personal training feels futile. My trainer told me he completely understands where I am coming from. He says that he was once like me. He said I seem driven to change :depressed: it feels like it is all an act. Like I trip over myself when I start to get happy. It feels intentional and it depresses me that my happiness is so fragile. It makes me want to die when I feel like I am some how wrecking all the work I have done. Help... how can I overcome this? Do I just visualize how come that is so hard? How can I only think about dying once work is over? Where did all my motivation go?