sometimes i want to quit

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ToddMAdl, Jul 17, 2008.

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  1. ToddMAdl

    ToddMAdl Well-Known Member

    Atleast once a day I think I want to quit on life. I'm not exactly in jeopardy of suicide but often times I don't want to be here because I don't like this world. Right now nothing feels very fulfilling, everything feels so empty. Even my hobbies aren't very fulfilling. I don't really like my life, all my life really I've always wanted to be someone else. I guess my biggest fear is that I won't get anything out of life as the years go by. I fear I won't accomplish goals and dreams which would be traumatizing and I think at that point I will have wished that I would have gone through with suicide all those years back so that I wouldn't have to endure that pain later on. I don't really know why life is this way and why the world isn't a better place but all I know is that it makes me sad.
  2. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    There are alot of people who are in the same boat. This life sucks, but it is the only one you have. I think if you asked people what they like about this world you would get alot of negative responces.
    What is it that you want out of life? Can you set goals to get what you want. Sure it is going to take some hard work.You might think about getting a therapist to help you figure this out. Good Luck...
  3. ToddMAdl

    ToddMAdl Well-Known Member

    I want everything. I wanted all the material things, I want a job that I both enjoyed and that paid well. I want the supermodel wife and the kids. I wanted to be a professional athlete growing up, even today I think that would be fulfilling. I don't have a good work ethic at all unless i'm interested or passionate about it. That's why I'm an average student because I don't try very hard because I simply don't care enough. I don't really know anymore what would be fulfilling and what would make me happy. All I do know is that I don't believe it will happen to me because I'm such a damn pessimist.
  4. ToddMAdl

    ToddMAdl Well-Known Member

    I have a psychologist and psychiatrist already fortunately.
  5. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Todd,
    Seeing how you brought it up. When you are at school, you really need to crack down and put forth the effort you are holding back. Your grades will help set the standard to which you can apply for employment. I know you want the better things in life, the thing you have to accept is you will have to work hard to acheive.
    Now that I probably irratated you I will leave you to think about it. Keep posting and stay safe..:chopper:..
  6. ToddMAdl

    ToddMAdl Well-Known Member

    Don't worry I'm used to being irritated. I've heard all the same bullshit before about actually putting forth effort in the stupid ass prison. I know I have to but I can't predict what I'll want to do at that time. It's always possible that I might not think it's worth it and maybe I'll just try to get by until I find something that interests me. It's impossible to tell now. I also don't work well when I'm sad or angry which has happened a lot over the years. Sometimes I can gut it out, other times not.
  7. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    You can still achieve the goals you set for yourself, but please don't limit yourself.
    Maybe the supermodel isn't the best wife for you. I am not sure the life of a professional athlete would be everything you thought it was. Things look great to an outsider, but problems are still there and sometimes exaggerated. The point is, even what looks perfect on the outside is not always perfect beneath the surface.
  8. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Don't let fear and uncertainty get in your way of having a good life. It's still in your hands. There will be hard times and certain points in the future where you feel the same as you do now but you have to see this through.
  9. Clockwork Reality

    Clockwork Reality Well-Known Member

    Stranger1 has said it best. It may seem hard right now, but try to devote yourself to your studies as best you can now so you can pursue life's finer pleasures when you're done. I'm sure that your school has a counselor that you can go to if you want person-on-person assistance, as well. Don't let your feelings get you down! Pursue your dreams, even if it seems like it sucks in the short term, and remember that experience is always the best teacher of all. Don't sell yourself short.
  10. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    Just sometimes??? I want to quit all the time.
  11. ToddMAdl

    ToddMAdl Well-Known Member

    I think the reason that I'm here is because I don't want to fail. I'm petrofied of failing at what I want to accomplish in every aspect. I've never believed in myself, I'm a true pessimist. I fear that I won't have love, long-term happiness and that everything will be even worse than it is now and I will have wished that I had gotten it over with earlier rather than having to go through that pain. I fear I will never be happy in this empty world. When you're as deep of a thinker as I am and thinking these morbid thoughts, priorities and things that are important don't seem very important in the big picture. It's infuriating when you have to do something that you absolutely hate and people tell you well that's life. I hate that. I hate jumping through hoops and hearing that just makes me want to quit all together, like it will always be that way. I've never been in jeopardy of suicide as I've had these thoughts for years but sometimes it really does sound like a better solution than to have to go through hell just to reach some happiness and then die which figuratively could be hell. Life just feels like a lose- lose game and I'm tired of playing!
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