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Sometimes the past never leaves

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Lola 2018, Mar 3, 2018.

  1. Lola 2018

    Lola 2018 Well-Known Member

    Rite now I'm so tired my past had stayed away for lots of yrs then one day my life changed everything came out now I have to deal with all the disgusting things I let my step dad do everyday it comes back the nite mares are terrible seeing his face smelling him feeling him and be told he's not really there I choose not to go on like this no one should live like this thank you for letting Me vent
  2. Karmitkurmit

    Karmitkurmit King of the Hedge SF Supporter

    Hello Lola.

    I'm sorry you're having to relive your past. What do you think has brought it back to you? Have you ever spoken to anyone about your ordeal?

    You can vent whenever you like and about whatever you like. I'm here to listen if you want to talk about it some more, or my PM is always open if you want more privacy. {{Hedgehugs}} to you.
  3. Lola 2018

    Lola 2018 Well-Known Member

    Thank you I'm not sure what brought it up but it hit full force
  4. Anttmel

    Anttmel Well-Known Member

    Hi Lola
    I am so sorry that happened to you. No child should have to deal with that sort of abuse. And you are not to blame for it. You did not “let” your stepfather do things to you. He was the adult. He used his position of trust and authority to take advantage of you. It was not right.

    Flashbacks and nightmares are not uncommon for people who have experienced abuse. Have you ever seen a counsellor for help? Would you be willing to see one?
  5. Lola 2018

    Lola 2018 Well-Known Member

    It's just hard to deal so many yrs later all I feel is I slept with my dad and that's disgusting I was in theropty for a yr doing exposures then when that didn't work he sent me to someone else to do act program I went 3 times she kept asking me if I was suicidal I said no she said if I did how would I do it so I told her she told the Dr and everyone thought they were going to lock me up so I quit all together now I don't know what to do I tried to end it last 2 nites but I didn't work I just can't keep reliving it over and over