The feeling takes you over. I thought I was strong, but apparently not as strong as I thought. When I'm thinking rationally I know that I don't want to die, I just want the pain to go away. Last night I ended up sleeping with a bottle of aspirin on the covers next to me. Fortunately I was dead tired and didn't didn't get the chance to take it before I fell asleep. Sitting here now, I don't want to die -- the feeling just took me over. I have a feeling that even though the battle was won, but the war still rages on. Has anyone else ever felt this? How did you deal with it?