Soon but I don't know when

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#1
I think it's any day now. The nightmares are exhausting and I feel completely alone. I can't be there for him and I am so depressed I can hardly breathe. I am tired and feel completely alone. I am the most selfish person right now. Why can't I be there? I want to die. I want to go home. This is not my home anymore. It never will be. I don't deserve him or anybody else. I am worthless and sick. It wouldn't be much of a loss. He would be so much happier without me. The best way is not to exist anymore. I can't stand the thought of the torment I will endure as a result of abandonment again. I tried before and the other one cut me down. I'm done. Goodnight.
 

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
#3
Hey oh god i know that pain abandonment feeling unworthy like a nothing a noone I understand okay but please know you can reach out here. There are alot of supportive people here who will stick by you and not abandon you okay.
Please hang in there will be other friends who care maybe even some from here just keep posting get to know us we care and we are not going anywhere
I know you are in pain but i know the pain will lessen in time it always does okay so please hang on from a person who has been abandoned many time and i am still here so please just keep reaching out.
 
#4
who can't you be there for? and why?
when it comes to being selfish, huh. i know that line. you're not being selfish here, ok? we've all been on a similar path ourselves and know that all you're doing is looking for someone to hear you. really hear you. and we do. and we'll listen because so many others listened to us here when all we were capable of doing was to take from others because we had nothing left to give. and that's all perfectly normal. we're here to give.

you won't be abandoned here and i know there's hope in there somewhere and we'll help you find it...
 
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