sorry for so much

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by KittyGirl, Mar 15, 2010.

  1. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry for making like... one thread a day here-- but I've got no one to talk to about these things.

    I just checked my facebook for the first time in awhile, and my ex messaged me a couple of times.
    Once to let me know that he still has my things, and would like to deliver them to me sometime soon- since I havent been able to come and get them
    and once more to let me know that he was moving and changing his facebook account... and would send me his new address and stuff after he moves.
    ...why?
    Why does he have to be so nice to me and pretend that he cares?
    I just want him to hate me if he doesn't want to be with me anymore... it's SO HARD for me to hate him- and to not be in love with him anymore!!
    I just can't do it at all!
    I keep trying to hard, but just can't do it!
    He was the person who protected me and stood by me for 10 years. he was my best friend and I don't want to let him go-- but he doesn't love me anymore and there's nothing I can do about it! IT's just not fair!!
    I wanna bash my face against the wall until I go to sleep forever or get brain damage!! >< AGHHH!!!!!

    I can't STAND this!!
    I just can't stand the fact that he isn't mine anymore-- like a spoiled fucking kid-- and I hate it!
     
  2. ZombiePringle

    ZombiePringle Forum Buddy and Antiquities Friend

    Its okay to do a bunch of threads on here. Thats why SF is here. You have to tell somebody these things and if you have nobody to talk to in real life then this is definitely a good alternative to that. I know for me I have a hard time talking about myself to a person face to face or on the phone. Posting about what I'm feeling and what not is just much easier to do.
     
  3. stuckinchicago6

    stuckinchicago6 Well-Known Member

    Hey, I feel the same way about my ex. It is not my first break-up, but it is definitely the hardest because I actually have a history with him. He is NOT just some guy I met at school or the mall and then we decided to date for a couple of months.
    We knew each other since 1997 when I was 9 and he was 6. There is just so much history. Our families know each other. He is in another country and I am here in the States, so it is really hard. I can't even go back to my house over there because I will run into him and probably see him with some new girl. Really sucks for me because I hate staying here in the U.S.A. I love this country, but it is just so boring and I have sooooo much more fun overseas. Still, I have to wait until I am sure he will be away at college before I can go back. The pain of seeing him and us not being together will be too much for me to handle.
     
  4. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    instead of starting a new thread- I thought I'd just add to it from now on...
    or...for awhile.
    I'm not quite sure what I'm doing...

    ahhhhn -___-
    I was just on Facebook, and realized something...
    3 more people I knew in highschool have had babies since december.
    That means that like... 40% of the girls I know have babies.
    ALL were accidental babies; but still...

    I wanted a baby soooo much! I still do- but I'd never want to bring one up without being stable and financially secure. How in the HELL are so many people just picking up and having children?!
    AHH!
    It's not fair! I'm not sure what's not fair... but something isn't!
    I feel like I should've been the first happy person with a baby; and that is what everyone expected. It's even in our graduating yearbook... -__-
    J(my freakin' ex) and I were voted most likely to get married and have a baby first.
    yeah fucking right.
    everyone else has babies and is getting married, and I live in my room alone- miserable... and the person whom I wanted to be with forever does not want me.

    nice.
    lovely.
    I guess it's great that he broke up with me before we got formally engaged; married or had a baby. -____-
    but I feel like I'd almost have been better off if I just had a mistake baby like everyone else.

    well, ladies... become responsible and stop partying now that you have a little person to take care of, for christsakes!!
    That is all I will say!! RAWRRR!!!