Sorry that I was "away"

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by Sain, Sep 6, 2014.

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  1. Sain

    Sain Active Member

    I'm sorry I was in hospital and just got out. I got pretty ill, as some of you may or may not know. I'm sorry, I couldn't get to a computer. I hope that everyone is doing ok. They think that I may have bipolar, and that is why my mood goes so low and fluctuates and delusions, etc. At least someone is listening to me. I survived and I'm feeling better right now. Hope that I can hang onto that. I'm sorry FMlife, Liam, for getting really "bad" and saying some stupid things that night. I didn't want to scare anyone, but I was extremely ill. I know that now. Well, I guess time will tell what I do have. I'm stable, for now, and home again. It feels good. Thanks for listening.

  2. W Miller

    W Miller Well-Known Member

    Glad to hear this Trish, you're home, and safe, and getting the help you need/deserve.

    The sun will shine again dear.

  3. FMyLife

    FMyLife Chat Buddy

    Welcome back Trish! I'm glad to know you are well and feeling better. I'm not going to lie. I did worry. But it fills me with joy to know you are okay. No need to apologize as we have all been there and know what its like. I know all to well. *hug
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Itoo am glad you got the help and support you need and that you are feeling more stable
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Patricia honey!! Omg, I did not know that you attempted, so sad to hear that you felt that low pet! :( But glad you have made it through and are now getting the appropriate help, a diagnosis is a good start hun! Take it slowly from there, and remember one day at a time! :hug:
  6. Sain

    Sain Active Member

    Thanks everyone. I forget to post here, as I always feel foolish when I pour my "guts" out sometimes, I suppose. But if a person holds it all in, the inevitable happens sometimes....doesn't it. I have a big problem with sharing things. You wouldn't think it sometimes, because I type a lot. But I mentioned something to my therapist, something that happened a month ago, and she was surprised/annoyed that I didn't share it with her. She thinks that is why I am not getting a proper/correct diagnosis over the years. It is hard to talk to people about things when you yourself don't understand what is happening to you. Anyway, that is my "rant" for this week. I am just glad that my stupidity didn't result in heartache. That's about all it would have accomplished. I have a daughter. She is a very young adult now. I tell myself, when I am ill, that she is grown now and that she doesn't need me anymore. What a crock. We are both Aspies and really understand each other. When we get together it is like magic. We get all the "in" jokes and just really get each other and have fun. Other people just look on like o_O, but we don't care...they just don't get us. And that's ok. We get each other and that's all that matters. And if I leave, she won't have that anymore. She won't have anyone to rant to about how her co-workers don't understand her. (Believe me, I really get that one.) We are "odd" and nerdy and geeky and listen to weird alt/folk/hipster music together and it is great! So I have to try to stay here for her. I mean, I only have 20-30 more years on this planet (if I'm lucky). I can do that, can't I? I hope that I can. I get so sick, though. So sick. And I forget about everything. I just see blackness and agony and want "out". I hope that I can get on the right meds and start to feel better. Ok, rant over now, lol.
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