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  1. ASolitaryBlue

    ASolitaryBlue Well-Known Member

    ive been barely hanging on for a long while now.

    there are 2 people id met here, and gotten very close to, that have convinced me time and time again to stay. last night one managed to find me and talk me out of going in the 5 bloody minutes i was at my laptop to shut the thing down before leaving to do it. how she managed to catch me at that exact time i dont know. and for a few minutes, talking to her, it looked like there might be another way. but i can see now there isnt. theres dreaming impossible things with no basis in reality and nothing more. if the people i was living for cant live, i should have done it last night. bc without them i cant do this. it sucks thats how it works but its true. i cant do this for me.

    its time to stop trying to find a grip. its time to let go and just free fall.

    im sorry to everyone here i made promises to and couldnt keep. and im sorry for any of you who wasted your time on me. thank you for everything, and good luck to you all.
     
  2. Rukia

    Rukia Well-Known Member

    :hug:
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    no the fall is to scarey and on the way down you realize you want to live not die you want to go out and just enjoy being who you are and being proud of you. Death doesn't bring you anything okay Get out and do things for you and the hell with everyone else.
     
  4. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    I love you liz... :hug:
     
  5. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    I'll reply to this later.... In the meantime, I'll continue to try to catch you on MSN.
     
  6. frostbitten1997

    frostbitten1997 Account Closed

    Dont give up,from what i see u have alot of people here that really care about you and want to help.keep working at it and talking to your friends here.I'll help too if i can
     
  7. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    you don't have to go...make new friends here and stay and help us all.....
    I don't want to lose you....
    :hug:
     
  8. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    Liz, please say something so we know you're OK.
     
  9. xXxRNBxXx

    xXxRNBxXx Senior member

    :hug: I love you hun i hope your going to be ok x
     
  10. ASolitaryBlue

    ASolitaryBlue Well-Known Member

    still alive. idk what ok is anymore.
     
  11. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    ok is just being here with us and talking.....
    thanks for letting us know you're still here..:wub::cheekkiss:
     
  12. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    *is incredibly relieved*
     
  13. ASolitaryBlue

    ASolitaryBlue Well-Known Member

    no. there just is no ok anymore. if i was smart i would have done it last night or the night before. if im smart ill do it tonight, the longer i stay the more it will hurt, so it sounds good to me.
     
  14. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    you really need to tell someone how you're feeling....
    get to a doctor, hospital,tell someone....
    you need some proffessional help to get you through this...
    I care ..I want you to live
     
  15. ASolitaryBlue

    ASolitaryBlue Well-Known Member

    nope. thats it. dad and then mum both just tried to have their own little "we know somethings wrong you seem depressed" talks with me to which i said nothing. thats it its got to be tonight.
     
  16. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    You are smart. Which is why you're not going to do anything stupid.

    Even though you're super smart, you're wrong though in thinking that your life can't turn around. That you'll never be happy. Because that's not true. The things in your life right now which are making you unhappy won't stay there forever. Things will change.

    Don't make the mistake to let your judgement be clouded by negativity.

    You're young. You're beautiful. You're smart. You're good. You're charming. You're talented. You've got a great education. You've got family. You've got friends. You've got everything going for you... Don't throw it all away. Life is precious. And it can be beautiful.

    Reach out to people... Reach out to your friends... Reach out to us. Let's talk about it. Let's work it out... To every problem there's a solution. We are here for you. We care deeply for you.
     
  17. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    NO!!!
     
  18. ASolitaryBlue

    ASolitaryBlue Well-Known Member

    thought that my parents finding out, not everything, but that im depressed (lied about not being suicidal) would help....

    moved into an apartment for the summer, around good people, away from home- thought that would help...

    but here i am, and its night, and i still hope for death.... and i know how i can make it happen.
     
  19. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    The thing with freefalling is that halfway down, you realize that you didn't really want to jump, and are then without a parachute.
     
  20. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    Exactly.
     
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