Speedy's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by Speedy, Sep 5, 2011.

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  1. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    When I am in certain moods, I get quite emotional, and what I do is turn off the music and just think and pour out thoughts. And for that reason, I have decided to make this a thread for poems I write as I think this will be a great outlet for me. I'm not sure anyone will enjoy this, and that is fine by me:

    I yearn for an embrace,
    to feel the touch of water,
    culminating in a breathless scream of pure elation.

    I seek to understand the complexities of human emotions,
    why we feel the way we do,
    why emotions pass us and we can't identify them.

    All of those unexplained emotions are flashy and in denial.
    I don't wish to be perfect,
    I wish to understand.
    But a surface understanding full of hypotheses is all I get,
    and thus the cycle of being frightened begins.

    I was born in a medium sized town,
    south in my country.
    and wherever I go I see passersby.

    Knowing that they are real and I am one second of their day is mind-boggling.
    Such a simple thing,
    yet so hard to take in.

    I want to be in their lives,
    I want to be in everyone's lives,
    but yet with that urge,
    I realize that I will always yearn for more,
    which begs the question of whether this ever ends,
    whether I can be truly fulfilled.
     
  2. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    "I feel uncomfortable," I say..
    There's a man and a woman sitting there,
    and there, and there!
    One looks like someone I'd be nervous around,
    and woah look at all those occupied tables!
    I know I'll probably never know a single one of them that are sitting in here this day,
    But I feel nervous just the same.

    I walk to each station to get a few plates of food,
    and then I get my straw and utensils to go with my beverage of choice,

    Yay! let's get out my iPhone,
    I get to escape,
    because that's what I do.
    I run away.

    I'm in artificial reality,
    at least until it's time to get my second serving of food or head back into my dorm room.
    Back in my shell,
    a shell that doesn't wish to shatter.

    A shell that carries the hopes of many beloved.
    "They would have wanted me to do well, wherever they may be now."
    "They all wanted the best for me, and there is no doubt in my mind about that."

    Yet, I'm nervous just the same.
    And school's off to a rough start.

    As I see the time winding down and the lunch ladies alerting all the folks finishing up their meals that the cafeteria is about to close,
    I realize that it's time for me to put everything up
    and head back to my shell.

    I'm not seeing as clearly as I'd like,
    My brain isn't functioning as well as I'd like,
    and I feel OK.
    Not great,
    not bad,
    Isolated, yeah!
    But what's new?

    Oceans of creatures,
    they're tantalizingly beautiful,
    I want to join them.
    Swimming with the dolphins,
    Fancy dream, aye?

    Lovely.
    Nature's a beauty,
    And my eyes are deceiving.
    Yet I, the easily deceived, love what I see to bits as if they're my own garden of Eden.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 5, 2011
  3. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    I spend my days living in a different world,
    much like the protagonist in "Avatar."

    Except, I'm living in cyberspace and not Pandora.

    Oh yes.
    I eat, I sleep, and I go through the daily motions.
    And then there's cyberspace.
    waiting for me,
    calling for me,
    drawing me in with its senseless touch.

    I hear you, cyberspace.
    Your voice is heard.
    Can you hear me?
    I'm helpless,
    Under control of an inanimate object.

    My mind is yours,
    I can't live without you,
    so you win.
    Go celebrate your victory.

    I lean on you.
     
  4. Isabel

    Isabel Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    very moving poems Alex ;hug;
     
  5. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    I'm walking around campus in the rain and wind right now. Boy, I love playing in the rain. Soaked completely lol... Got my phone in a plastic bag and im stopping at a building before i head back. Haha umm so apparently others bring umbrellas or stay indoors. Heh anyhow... Fun times; I felt trapped In my dorm and hadn't been outdoors since Saturday so it was well worth it. Brought out the kid in me. Now I feel replenished... Period. Lol... I don't recommend this haha! Nothing like fresh air and the touch of water!

    Edit now cleaned up and having a chocolate milkshake with whipped cream and a cherry on top at Chick-fil-A!
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 5, 2011
  6. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    You seem to work out so many things through your poetry...and ask so many profound questions...I think this is one wonderful function of writing...these are wonderful...thanks for sharing
     
  7. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Pretty Please With A Cherry On Top!!

    Thanks so much, Marie and J! :hug: :hug:

    .......................

    Walking or jogging in the rain to Chick-fil-A for a free chicken sandwich may sound like a good idea at first,
    but next time I'm bringing an umbrella!

    To be blunt, the trip back to my dorm SUCKED,
    so pretty please with a cherry on top let me develop some ice cold veins!

    The chocolate milkshake I had didn't help me develop any resistance to the downpour,
    but that's no problem!
    oh, and it cost $3.09 + tax for your information,
    although that's too much information..

    Anyways, here, Alex!
    Have the cherry from the chocolate milkshake with whipped cream on top.
    Pretty please with a cherry on top...

    K thanks! :)
     
  8. xoCherie

    xoCherie Well-Known Member

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    The cyberspace one really grabbed my attention.
    It's how I feel, how I'm guessing a lot of us feel
     
  9. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    I think you're right. Being sort of stuck in cyberspace existence is one of the hardest things for me to admit to people I've just met. Often, they ask me what I like to do in my spare time, and it's not an easy question to answer truthfully.

    It's something I think that needs to be talked about more, to be recognized more widely as an integral part of some people's lives. To each their own. Hugs.

    Alex
     
  10. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    I talk with a sense of urgency,
    with my mind fluttering and my tone fluctuating.

    I'm a dear old butterfly,
    Blue as can be.

    It's a cloudy day today, I say.
    Chilly, windy, and just plain uncomfortable.
    I don't see the mountains here,
    Where are thy mountains?

    I look for my nest,
    I search for my mates,
    but there's no sign of anything.

    No sign of camaraderie.

    I'm a blue butterfly, remember?
    with ice cold wings that are starting to fail me.

    Around the clock 247,
    I'll be looking for beautiful, blooming flowers.

    I seek one thing,
    and one thing only:

    a rejuvenation potion.

    It's colorful,
    it's endearing,
    and it's where newlyweds are born.

    Take my hand in marriage,
    would you please, my dear?
     
  11. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    This school year has started off so disastrously.
    it's a student's worst nightmare,
    but I'm proud to say I made it through this week.

    I write this in the hopes that my strong bifocals that come will give me the chance to thrive,
    because these past two weeks have really, really tested my well-being.

    In the end, I chose health first,
    grades second.

    I couldn't take the pain.
    I had to remain sane.

    And now I have some pretty disappointing grades.

    But you know what? I don't regret it.
    I'm not feeling suicidal.
    And that's all that matters.

    Now try to up that,
    yes I'm talking to you:
    my one and only pair of eyes.
     
  12. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    My Life Stressors

    Let me be free,
    no more worries for a week.
    sometimes it's so easy to forget how stressed I can feel about formal occasions.

    I've never been a fan of attending weddings,
    piano recitals,
    meetings,
    you name it.

    Such stressful times yet exceedingly memorable.

    However memorable or positive the experiences were,
    I do not look back at any of them and smile.

    Those times,
    then and now,
    are painful memories.

    Painful for me,
    And thus the dreading begins until I get what's on my mind addressed,

    In my mind,
    I know it's right,
    but oh how I dread it so!
     
  13. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    Desperate is me,
    Trying to find out what gives,
    Broken and lonely.
     
  14. Julia-C

    Julia-C Well-Known Member

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    I have only read the first one so far. All I can say is wow. That's so what I have been trying to say. Thanks so much for sharing.
     
  15. Sais

    Sais Well-Known Member

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    I loved reading this thread, keep it going! :)
     
  16. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    Thanks for all the input! I appreciate that. :thumbup:

    Today, we watched a lecture in one of my classes. We watched a short YouTube clip of it, called "The Last Lecture: Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams." For that reason, today's class will always be memorable. The lecturer was named Randy Pausch: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Randy_Pausch

    ...................

    The Eyes That Try to See

    My embarrassments and disappointments make my own picture of life more grey and volatile,
    and I don't feel like I have anything to prove.

    I wish I could remember when I did not build up bottles and bottles of root beer in my system.
    I want to know better,
    to touch them again,
    maybe rework their inner solutions.

    I mean,
    the taste of root beer is okay,
    it's zesty and bubbly,
    but I feel the need to complain,
    to be an inner pain.

    You're locked in my head,
    boiling and rumbling,
    all while I'm powerless.

    Oh sweet dreams,
    how you escape me so!

    Still,
    my bottles of root beer are forever,
    and all I wish is to realistically dilute the solution.

    Maybe one day,
    one day really soon,
    I will remember to give you my new memories.

    Rest assured,
    I won't be asleep when I do so.

    And don't you worry,
    you sweet thing.
    it will be in a new bottle,
    one to set the standards of my terms.

    I try to see,
    so let me be.
     
  17. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    Please take note, Alex.
    Take your meds,
    all the time knowing that the half-life for Pristiq is so short.

    Or else suffer.
    suffer endless pain,
    unpleasant withdrawal symptoms,
    and in my case severe nausea, dizziness, blurry vision and headaches.

    These effects start immediately for me around 4-5 hours after a missed dose.
    I will urge myself,
    I will egg myself on.

    Take your meds, Alex.

    Just don't forget.
    Because if you do,
    you will suffer like you did tonight,
    and damn I do not want 3 nights in a row of all hell breaking loose.

    I feel like I want to upchuck,
    I wanna scream in pure agony.

    Oh please, Alex.
    PLEASE, for the love of peace and well-being,
    PLEASE take your meds from now on and don't forget anytime soon.

    Oh....
    My...
    GOD!!!!!

    Tonight sucked...
    it sucked a hell of a lot.
     
  18. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    When I'm in an extremely odd mood,
    and I don't feel like myself.
    I dedicate the night to doing laundry and eating midnight munchies!

    Music and munchies,
    Sweetness!!!!

    Let's have fun and celebrate a ton!
    How sweet it is to put my clothes in the washer for the first time this week.
    Pee-eww!!

    Smells like teen spirit!
    Wub that song!!! :)
     
  19. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    When I turn the keys,
    a new day has come,
    and I ride in style.

    But it is not the style with which I drive my life of which I am proud of,
    not with rainy days and stormy days,
    nature's tolling on us everywhere,
    even sirens and horns piercing my eardrums.

    My driving style is safe yet dangerous,
    most of all filled with uninformed decisions
    all made faster than my mind can process.

    Luck is not there for me.

    Love or lust,
    I do not know,
    but one second is all it takes.

    innocence is precious to me,
    and ignorance is bliss.

    I am not blissful,
    but what does that mean to me?

    Thick, gooey baloney that won't stop sticking to my fingers, I say!
    so many questions may never be answered again.

    Either way I do not wish to drive a car again,
    for I am scared of crashing.

    And so I remain hidden in my shell.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 16, 2011
  20. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Re: Alex's Bundles of Emotions (The Collection To Be Continued...)

    The poofy-haired kid,
    you saw me in those pictures,
    I'm almost 19 now!

    Somewhere there is hope,
    Think children are our future?
    I believe in them.

    "Live as I believed,"
    That's what my dreams were for life,
    I just wanted friends.

    Just people to love,
    To keep me company then,
    maybe stay in touch.

    Lend a hand someday,
    as I would for them in time,
    but all was for naught.

    Happens to some kids,
    if only we could find them,
    and they could find us.

    Would be magical,
    like finding hidden treasure
    underneath the earth.

    Gems that are sparkly,
    jaded but uniquely shaped,
    many are out there.

    I wish to find one,
    one that I can call a friend,
    someone to befriend.

    Are you out there now?
    I am sure you are, comrades,
    We'll unite one day.

    It'll be a party,
    a real nice get-together,
    the drinks are on me.
     
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