This is the first time I've joined a site like this. I was always raised in an environment that treated emotional pain as an imaginary thing, but as time goes on, this is worse and worse for me and I have to rewrite what I was taught to treat this as. I feel stuck, and without hope. Time goes on and I lose hope as it goes on. Soon it will be over and I won't know what to do. The economy keeps me from finding work. Without work, I feel like I can't continue forward with life, and without that I just become stagnant water. I don't know how to continue and how to live. Summer is ending soon, and when it ends I will finally have to reach my consequences. But I am not so afraid of the punishment as I am for if I am given a by. Then my life will just be stagnant. I don't know how to continue. Is this all I will be? I wish I could talk to someone about this. I feel locked out ffrom many of my usual support groups. And so I joined this. More as a way to "let it out" and see my thoughts as physical representations instead of emotions.