Started cutting more again (trigger maybe)

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by sadhart, Oct 8, 2011.

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  1. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I thought I had come to terms with cutting but with so much hurt and stress increasing in my life, I've been doing it more lately. The thing is, I have lost my never to cut...I am afraid to cut deep like I used to, but that physical pain is easier to deal with than the emotional. This past Tuesday, my aunt made me so mad, I went in my room and started punching the wall until my knuckels started to bleed. It actually helped me feel better...if I had called my aunt out for being in the wrong, it would have made things worse.

    I'm sorry for the rambling post, I'm just so upset right now about my life.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hope you can find someone you trust to talk to hun talking helps so much be it a relative a freind a minister a councilor but talk okay hugs
     
  3. ms1972

    ms1972 New Member

    I so felt the say way. But when someone I love really hurts my feelings damned it to dont reach or a blade. But it getting dangerous for me, in the heat of it I just want to hurt, and having a lot of tools and blades about it's easy. I've gone deep a few time, scary shit when you see adipose tissue between the edges. I recently did that on upper forearm and it was so hard to treat. Guess the feelings of guilt or rage disappear when your mind says GET TO A FRIGGEN ER, not the point. But br careful, I have very ugly permanent scaring on mt legs and arms, caused by sharpes rough metal, even superheated metal. And now each reminds me of when I failed to use CBT and apply coping skills better. I know it works but I think I works like heroin does for that type of addict.
     
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